March 2011 Weather News!
On March 11th I was on the road for work. At six fifteen a.m. I turned on the news to hear the live coverage of the earthquake and tsunami that struck Japan. Tsunami warnings were issued in Hawaii, Alaska and down the entire length of the west coast. This really sounded serious, and just like I did on September 11th, I called the Lovely Mrs. BlueDuck and told her to check out the news.
The earthquake literally rocked the planet knocking it three inches off of its axis. The island of Japan moved six feet! At a 9.0 on the Richter Scale it was the strongest ever to strike Japan and the third strongest of recorded history on this planet.
Your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather rarely reports on natural disasters not associated with weather such as volcanoes, earthquakes and massive oil spills. But when they have the ability to effect the environment, weather and even life as we know it we have to do our just duty. When I read the words Radiation Alert after the nuclear reactors in Japan were in trouble I thought no weather alert could be this bad, even a massive hurricane. With weather you can feel it, see it and even taste it. But with radiation, nothing unless you are close enough to be burned to death.
The images of this tragedy unfolded before our eyes on the limitless media outlets and the Lovely Mrs. Blueduck told me the apocalyptic photos reminded her of Cormack McCarthy’s “The Road.” Although not as personal and close to home, the mayhem unfolding was every bit as profoundly disturbing as the morning of September 11th, 2001.
Our hearts go out to the fine people of Japan who have demonstrated the true spirit of helping one another in a grave time of need. Unlike the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina when “fine” Americans murdered each other, looted and generally panicked, the people of Japan are demonstrating they know how to handle a tragedy and each other. After all it wasn’t that long ago two nuclear bombs obliterated hundreds of thousands of people in Japan.
Every thing else in this weather journal may seem trite and insignificant in the wake of Japan’s tragedy. But take it down to a personal level, meaning you and your family. It only takes one storm, one flood, one snowfall, one killer wind or one wildfire to either change or end your life or the lives of your loved ones. If that ever happens to you it will change your world every bit as profoundly as the disaster in Japan.
There is so much to read, digest, meditate and pass out from boredom in this fine edition of Blue Duck Weather. Included in the brilliant reporting you will find out what Wyoming ranchers really feel about the latest proposed coyote control, a troubling early fire season for parts of the U.S., heavy snow in the eastern U.S. actually tied to global warming (you have to rely on weather science and not political spin to draw your own conclusions), another United States animal officially declared extinct (this is troubling down to my soul), more mass wildlife extinctions (more troubling), a monkey in a woman’s bra (we don’t make this shit up), find out what a Rodenator is, mountain lions spotted in north Scottsdale, a “domestic” dog and a coyote running together and the latest weather radar break through called Dual Polarization.
Well, fucking summer is on the way for the vast desert of Arizona. It was twenty degrees warmer at the end of March than the beginning as average temperatures go. At Talking Trees and Antelope Hill it was eleven degrees warmer. The average temperature for the month at The Land was 63.50 degrees. The average temperature in the high country of New Mexico was 45.22 degrees.
The average humidity at The Land was 32.62 percent. The average dew point was close at 29.83 degrees.
If barometric pressure really affects our local migraine sufferers they should have had a “stable” month. It was fairly consistent but on March 5th through the 7th it dropped like a rock and meant a subsequent Wind Advisory.
The Land had a gentle soaking rain of .21 inches on March 21st, Phoenix received a trace. The total rainfall for the year at The Land is .52”, Phoenix .76”.
For some reason my reliable lake level source did not include Lake Mead or Powell (maybe their embarrassed.) this month. But Lake Pleasant is a healthy 92% full and Roosevelt a robust 93%
The quote of the month I had no shame in stealing is “In the wilderness is the preservation of the World.” (until us two legged’s came along.)
3-1- Crews in rescue boats have rescued thirty people from floods in Ohio. Melting snow and rain threaten all 88 counties in this state.
Speaking of Ohio, this report (true and verified and not just a bunch of shit) comes from my good friend TiptoDuck who is from the Ohio: The Sierra Club and the U.S. Forest Service were presenting, in a meeting with Wyoming ranchers, an alternative for controlling coyote populations without shooting or trapping them. The more “humane” solution proposed would be to capture the ‘yotes alive, the males castrated and then they would be set free.
One rancher in the back of the room stood up, tipped his hat back and said “Son, I don’t think you understand our problem here. These coyotes ain’t fuckin’ our sheep, they’re eating them.”
The meeting never really got back to order.
3-2- Downtown Findlay, Ohio is flooded from heavy rain. The Blanchard River crested at 5.5’ above flood stage.
Sixteen thousand acres have burned and one firefighter injured by fast moving wildfires moving through Florida’s central Atlantic coast.
A group of scientists attribute global warming for the massive snow fall in the U.S. this winter. New York and Chicago had record snow fall. At one point every state except Florida had snow on the ground. The old adage “It’s too cold to snow” has some truth to it one meteorologist said. A colder atmosphere holds less moisture limiting snowfall. In the Arctic temperatures were at record warm levels and the area of the Arctic Ocean covered with ice dropped to record levels for this past December, January and February.
3-3- The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has officially declared that the eastern mountain lion is extinct. Some mountain lion enthusiasts have insisted there is still a small breeding population of the eastern cats. But after a lengthy review federal officials concluded there are no breeding populations and the species has probably been extinct since the 1930s. This cougar will be removed from the endangered species list where it was placed in 1973.
(The finality of this proclamation is beyond sad, beyond tragic. It turns the finite into the infinite in a space where we have no comprehension.)
The earth has undergone mass extinctions, during which more than 75% of existing species disappear, exactly five times in the past 540 million years. But researchers from the University of California say we may beginning the sixth extinction period. (What happens when 100% of the planet’s species are gone, a black hole?)
Seventy illegal immigrants are rescued off of the snowy San Diego Mountains in California. One has died and most of the others had varying degrees of hypothermia. This area is popular for crossings and these immigrants did not know the weather would be so brutal.
3-4- Thousands are evacuating areas in Bolivia where mud and rock slides continue to bury homes and rivers that are ready to spill their banks.
3-5- Violent weather strikes the South and an EF2 tornado has been confirmed in Rayne, Louisiana where one person was killed and eleven injured. Sixty homes have been destroyed there. Some have been evacuated for the threat of ruptured gas lines. Tornado watches are issued from Alabama to Florida. New Orleans is receiving two inches of rain per hour. There is more flooding in Ohio. Twenty six states are under flood warnings from Mississippi to Vermont.
3-6- First 80 degree day at The Land. Spring is on the way (and then hell according to the lovely Mrs. Blue Duck.)
A Wind Advisory is posted for northern Arizona with gusts up to 60mph expected.
The person that was killed in Louisiana yesterday from a tornado was a 21 year old woman protecting her toddler from the wind. Part of a huge oak tree crashed into her home. 1500 residents are still unable to return home in Rayne. Confirmed winds of the tornado have been established at 135mph! A State of Emergency is declared for the Louisiana town.
According to firefighters and weather forecasters the Southwest is in for an active fire season. The conditions are prime with dry vegetation, above normal temperatures and strong winds. Officials say conditions are expected to worsen in southeast Arizona and New Mexico.
Fresh grizzly bear tracks have been spotted in Yellowstone National Park. This means some of the bears are finished with winter hibernation and are searching for food. ( I bet the bastards are cranky and I’m certainly glad I am not on their menu.)
Ten pronghorn antelope are struck and killed by a vehicle in southern Wyoming. It appears it was intentional and an investigation is underway. ( Something about this makes no sense. How can you “intentionally” hit ten wild animals of any kind with a vehicle, just whistle and line them up in the middle of the road while you rev up your engine and gun it? Hell, it would be damn near impossible to shoot ten antelope on the run at one time. Oh, I got it. It was some whacked out trucker deranged from no sleep, on speed and buckets of coffee. He saw ten “ghosts” in the road and screamed “I’m coming through you sons a bitches” and gunned his eighteen wheel Freightliner for all it was worth.)
3-7- Dust Storm Warning posted for Tucson expires at three p.m. Most of the rest of Arizona is under a High Wind Advisory.
60mph winds in Winslow with snow and sleet.
A group of Flagstaff residents are pushing U.S. Service officials to ban camp fires from May 1st until monsoon rains begin. They argue that last year’s Schultz Fire could have been avoided. It started with an abandoned camp fire.
From his secluded location in Colorado RyDuck reported that the temperature at two p.m. was 60 degrees colder than Gilbert, Arizona at this time. (I could, for once, hear just a hint in his voice that he is ready for spring.)
21’’ of snow fell in Burlington, Vermont by this morning and upstate New York has 24’’ of snow with 30mph winds.
Cyclone Yasi last month caused severe but “spotty” damage to Australia’s Barrier Reef. Signs of recovery will show in five years, but it will take more than twenty years to regain complete coral cover.
3-8- The storm that battered upper New England with snow yesterday has deluged western Connecticut with so much rain parts of homes and cars floated down a swollen river.
A wind driven wildfire near Silver City, New Mexico has destroyed 15 homes with 200 evacuated and 1800 acres have burned. High winds have prevented air drops of water. Officials suspect the fire was human caused. Silver City has only received one tenth of an inch of rain since January 1st and fire conditions are prime.
3-9- Severe weather across the Southeast has caused three tornadoes in New Orleans area (Happy Mardi Gras) and SEVEN INCHES of rain in parts of Mississippi.
There is severe flooding in Little Falls, New Jersey from rain and melting snow. One river there is five feet above normal flows.
The Quail Ridge fire near Silver City, New Mexico is 50% contained. Thirteen homes and forty seven out buildings have been destroyed. New Mexico officials are worried about more fires this season due to drought and tender dry vegetation.
3-10- The fire in New Mexico is still only 50% contained. The cause has been determined as a vehicle’s hot catalytic convertor. (God, it must be dry!)
Record breaking rain falling in the North East. Most of New Jersey is declared a State of Emergency. The Connecticut River is running higher than in 41 years.
Alabama and Louisiana’s governors declared States of Emergency yesterday after five separate tornadoes were reported.
In the first ever census of marine predators there are 219 adult Great White sharks along the coast of California each fall. This is fewer than expected. (Seems like plenty to me, especially if I were a surfer, a swimmer or a “sitting duck”.)
One million sardine carcasses are found in King Harbor, Redondo Beach California. There are 65 tons of fish to remove! “The prevailing theory is that windy conditions, predators or perhaps a column of oxygen poor water in the ocean forced masses of sardines into the harbor. Their huge numbers in such a confined area caused oxygen levels to plummet below life sustaining levels.”
More rain and flooding in Brisbane, Australia. A huge band of monsoon rain along the coast has prompted Flash Flood Warnings for Queensland state.
A 1.5 million dollar marijuana growing operation inside of a house in California had a four foot long alligator named Willy guarding the plants. When the operation was busted police turned Willy over to wildlife officials. (Is this where the song “I’ll Never Smoke Weed with Willie Again” came from?)
3-11- Flooded rivers are raging across the East forcing evacuations. Flooding has turned one highway into swimming pools for ducks. (I particularly liked this one.) One dead in Ohio and one in Pennsylvania. Some of the hardest hit areas are outside of New York City. 1300 homes have been evacuated in Pequannock, New Jersey.
(Your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather has been reporting for several years about the declining world bee populations. We don’t think many realize the drastic effect and how this could impact the world’s food supply. We would be in deep shit or eating shit! Here is the latest.) Honey producing bee colonies have dropped off in the U.S. from a population of 5.5 million in 1950 to 2.5 million in 2007. Bees are essential to pollinate crops to feed the world’s expanding population. Of the 100 crop species that provide 90% of the world’s food, 70 are pollinated by bees.
3-12- Today marks the first day of spring at the Land! I noticed brand new leaves on mesquite trees for the first time. That says a lot for me as I can’t tell the difference between green and brown. The Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck has to remind me when I am watering dead plants. It is amazing that anything is blooming after the painful freeze last month. Some of our trees and plants took a beating and may not return. But leave it to indigenous trees on the desert to thrive; from 17 degrees to 117 degrees they seem to flourish.
Crews are gaining ground on a wildfire near Boulder, Colorado. Driven by strong winds 200 acres have burned and forced the evacuation of 200 homes. The fire was human caused. The NWS had issued a Red Flag Warning across much of eastern Colorado before the fire began.
Red Flag Warnings are issued for Texas and Oklahoma.
800 people are rescued from their stranded vehicles during a blizzard in North Dakota. Military trucks and other heavy vehicles had to be used to get to the stranded motorists. Although only two to four inches of snow fell, 60 mph winds created white out conditions that made the situation much worse.
Hundreds evacuate as rivers rise from Maryland to Maine. Parts of flood prone northern New Jersey has had five inches of rain since March 10th on top of melting snow.
In Covington, Kentucky a floating restaurant broke away from a pier on the flooded Ohio River. 83 people inside the joint had to be rescued.
3-13- The Passaic River in New Jersey crests at five feet above flood stage and 2,000 homes are evacuated.
A woman walked into a Virginia court house with a tiny monkey, wearing a pink dress, tucked into her bra. When questioned the woman said the monkey was only seven weeks old and requires constant attention. (No comment.)
3-14- The worst city in the nation for pollen count today is Prescott, Arizona and Phoenix takes the dubious honor of 5th place.
Snow runoffs will flow into Arizona rivers at nearly record lows this spring. The forecast for March through May: the Little Colorado River will flow at 18% of the median, the Salt River at 22%, The Gila at 23% and the Verde River at 42% of median flows.
Two javelina have been shot illegally in Tucson’s Ventana Canyon area. Game and Fish officers responded to a call about an injured pig and another dead pig was found in a trash container. Both had been shot by a high powered pellet gun. A one thousand dollar reward is being offered by Game And Fish for information leading to the arrest and conviction of the shooter(s).
Heavy rains in southern Brazil since March 10th have caused severe flooding and 20,000 people to evacuate. Two people have died from landslides and a third is missing.
3-15- Five thousand acres have burned in the Coronado National Forest in Arizona near the Mexican border. It is 65% contained but no information how it was started.
The evacuations from flooding in Brazil are up to 31,000.
3-16- The first official 90 degree day in Phoenix. The normal average for the first 90 is April 4th, the earliest is February 24th.
Icebreakers have been sent to free 160 ships trapped by sea ice in the Gulf of Finland near Russia. The area has not had this much thick ice since 1992.
3-17- High Wind Advisory issued for northern Arizona.
Three landscapers in Scottsdale, Arizona are stung by aggressive (or pissed off) bees. One is hospitalized.
Heavy snow in Sendai, Japan adds to the misery of last week’s earthquake and tsunami aftermath. With the snow and cold the chances of finding any more survivors is unlikely.
Torrential rain in the central Philippines causes a mudslide that buries a family of seven asleep in their home. 1360 people are evacuated.
3-18- The fire near Nogales in the Coronado National Forest is almost contained with 6,000 acres burned. Investigators say the fire “was likely caused by people.”
Spring flooding has begun and the greatest danger is in the Northeast and Midwest.
“Tiny amounts of radiation from Japan reach California by wind currents. The first reading are “about a billion times beneath levels that would be health threatening.” ( This pisses me off, the fucking press! Why report something that isn’t a problem ? I read later in the day there was no radiation readings. There is already panic and fear in the streets. It is understandable in Japan, but here? The press say they owe us the “facts”. The press are nothing but sharks in clothes and the dirtier the laundry the more they get off on it. Your award winning staff at Blue Duck Weather gives it to you straight, unbiased and to the point.)
Flooding and landslides have now killed ten and 14,000 evacuated in the Philippines.
3-19- Radiation detected in Spinich and milk in northern Japan. Traces are also found in tap water in Tokyo. “Amounts are very small” but exceed government standards.
The “Rodenator” is a Colorado state approved, since 2006, device to blow up prairie dog holes. It explodes burrows by igniting a propane mixture pumped into the holes. Residents in Boulder are complaining it is cruel, inhumane and extremely loud.
3-20- The “official” first day of spring.
The Valla Canyon Fire near Santa Fe, New Mexico is 10% contained at 70 acres.
3-21- The first full day of spring brings valley wide showers in the Phoenix area. The morning low was twelve degrees higher than the afternoon high. Dust Storm Warnings issued for Pinal county. I-17 is closed at the Sedona exit because of snow.
Spring storm brings flooding in southern California with two and a half inches in Los Angeles and TEN INCHES in parts of Santa Barbara county. I-5 north of L.A. closed due to snow in ice in the mountains. Rain, wind and downed trees leave 90,000 without power.
Four feet of snow fell on Mammoth Mountain in California bringing the season’s total to FORTY FOUR FEET, a new record.
The number one city with the most snow (for its region) this winter season is New York City. Two of seven storms had twenty inches of snow. It was the third snowiest winter on record for the city with 60.9’’. The average snowfall there is 22’’. It was the snowiest season in fifteen years and a record set in January with 36’’ for the month alone.
Milk, spinach and other leafy vegetable sales are suspended in northern Japan near the nuclear reactor.
3-22- The Duke fire in the Coronado National Forest, near Patagonia, Arizona, has burned 3500 acres and is growing.
One hundred homes west of Denver, Colorado are evacuated as strong winds spread a wildfire that has burned 1200 acres.
A north Phoenix family let their blind dog out in their front yard. The pooch was attacked by two pit bulls and was injured so badly it had to later be put down. Two members of the family tried to break up the attack, were bitten and sent to the hospital. The “killer” dogs were captured and will be put down in ten days if no one claims the convicts.
3-23- The Duke fire in southern Arizona has burned 4000 acres and is only 10% contained. Two hundred firefighters are trying to extinguish it.
Miles of beaches in Long Beach, California are closed from a sewage spill. With ten inches of rain in some areas the sewer system could not handle the run-off and 250,000 gallons were spilled into the L.A. River flood control canal. The stinking shit ran forty miles downstream before reaching the ocean.
Thirty two radio collared musk oxen were found frozen in the ice on the eastern coast of Alaska’s Seward Peninsula. They were killed by a tidal surge and floods from a storm blowing in off of the Chuckchi Sea. The fate of 23 others is unknown.
Thousands of endangered penquins have been covered with oil after a cargo ship ran aground and broke up on a remote British South Atlantic territory. 1650 tons of crude oil was released.
3-24- The Duke fire has burned 5,000 acres and is 15% contained. Two hundred firefighters are still on site.
The fire west of Denver is 80% contained and calmer winds are allowing air support to douse the fire.
A strong storm hits portions of eight states with Pennsylvania and Tennessee sustaining the worst damage. 90 homes are damaged in Greensburg, Pennsylvania from a tornado and hail. A foot of snow has fallen in the Dakotas and upstate New York.
Radiation in Tokyo drinking water “rises to dangerous levels” for infants. Milk, fruit and vegetable imports from there are suspended in the United States. Japan food imports are 4% of U.S. food supply.
3-25- You read about it first in the amazing Blue Duck Weather last year: A man was mauled by bears he was feeding while employed at a tourist attraction in Montana. The dude was high on pot at the time. Now the Montana Supreme Court has ruled that 65,000 dollars in medical bills for the idiot be covered by Worker’s Compensation.
3-26- A North Scottsdale, Arizona couple spotted three mountain lions, a mother and two cubs, on the fourth hole of the Desert Mountain golf course. The “kitties” hung around long enough to have their pictures taken by the couple.
The latest round of storms in California have residents evacuated in Santa Cruz County. A failed drainage pipe caused a 15’ by 100’ hole in the ground near homes and sent a three foot wall of water. In Monterey County farm workers are having a hard time getting to flooded fields to pick lettuce and broccoli. 40 miles of the Pacific Coast Highway is closed through Big Sur due to rockslides.
Just north of Sacramento, Califorina two “weak” tornadoes struck this week in Colusa County. With winds between 65mph and 85 mph these tornadoes are classified as EF-O. This county has not had one tornado from 1950 to 2010. They have now had three this year and four in the past five months.
One wildfire south of Denver is fully contained. The two and a half square mile fire near Frankton was completely surrounded by firelines yesterday. Just twenty four hours earlied 8500 people had to be evacuated. Another fire burning in the foothills west of Denver is expected to be fully contained by today.
2500 rubber ducks are stolen from an Illinois police academy. The toys were to be used for a “Duck Pluck” to raise funds for the academy. (They weren’t stolen, they were rescued! I have connections in the under duck world.)
3-27- Crews are getting closer containing a wildfire that has burned 14 square miles in North Carolina. It is 40% contained and cool, damp weather is helping the fight. No official cause has been stated but the fire is near a military base. Training with live fire was going on the day the fire started.
Four skiiers are dead and one missing after an avalanche in the Swiss Alps. The accident happened on the 12,200 foot Mont Velan.
Severe thunderstorms pound the Southeast for a second day with tornadoes, hail and high winds. Hail as big as tennis balls reported in portions of Georgia, Alabama, and South Carolina.
A coyote and a black Labrador in Duluth, Minnesota have been seen running together. The same black Lab has been seen attacking and taking down a deer. Both canines live in the wild. A wildlife manager said that coyotes and Labs would not travel together. But she changed her mind after seeing a photo of the two renegades side by side.
3-28- “Trace amounts of radioactive iodine linked to Japan’s nuclear power station have turned up in rain water as far away as Massachusetts in the past week.”
Seventy seven percent of Americans polled do not know where their drinking water comes from. ( I can’t believe 77% polled are stupid, just ignorant and all too assuming. I suppose it is the same mentality as people who eat meat are opposed to killing animals. “Yes sir, I get my water from a plastic bottle and my burger is served from MacDonalds.” Good God!)
3-29- Mesa, Arizona police officers shoot and kill a pit bull that attacked them after responding to a viscious dog call. The caller said he saw a black pit bull trying to attack his neighbor who retreated safely into his house. The officers used a taser twice, before shooting the fucker, but it had no effect.
The fastest, longest lasting tornadoes strike in the South East but usually in the dark of night. Dixie Alley, as it is known, is just an extension of the more famous Tornado Alley on the Great Plains. There actually is no dead space between the alleys where the tornado risk stops and then starts again.
BREAKING NEWS: The largest upgrade to the nation’s weather radars since Doppler was installed in the early 90s is underway. Dual polarization radar will play a big role in spotting tornadoes. Doppler cannot spot a tornado if it is cloaked by rain. This new system will be able to detect tornadoes, not visible before, up to seventy five miles away. This will allow quicker warnings to be issued to the public. These radars are so precise they can detect individual types of percipitation such as rain or hail.
Hundreds of tourists are stranded on the resort island of Samui in Thailand where five days of rain has caused major flooding and damage. The airport is closed and main roads and some bridges are impassable due to rock and mud slides.
3-30- Near record snowfall in the Sierra Nevada Mountains this year may end the drought “officially” in California. After officials release their latest snow survey today the governor may declare the drought is over. SIXTY-ONE FEET has fallen this season, second only to the 1950-51 season of sixty five feet.
Two fishermen in the Gulf fifty miles offshore of Freeport, Texas were fishing for red snapper. As they were dumping fish entrails overboard they heard two big splashes. All of a sudden something slammed into the side of the boat. In a feeding frenzy a 375 pound mako shark leapt into the boat. The fishermen could not get close enough to the thrashing shark to try and throw the beast out. It damaged the boat before dying several hours later.
3-31- The first ninety degree day at The Land, sixteen days after Phoenix reports their first one.
A Mesa, Arizona man accidentally started a fire in his attic after using brake fluid and a cigarette lighter to destroy a beehive. (Common sense does not prevail with this idiot.)
The California drought is declared officially over.
40 homes damaged in central Mississippi by 110mph winds and golf ball size hail.
Severe weather in Florida. Wind and hail damage feared for the space shuttle Endeavor as it rests on its launch pad for next month’s final flight. Inspections underway. Tornadoes are reported in Tampa.
Southern Thailand receives more heavy rain and 15 are dead from mudslides. 716,000 people have been affected by almost a week of heavy rain. All residents of high risk areas are ordered to evacuate.
Radiation detected in milk in Washington, State, “far beyond levels of public health concern.” fifteen states have detected radioactive iodine-131- with a half life of only eight days.
(For some reason the following story received world wide attention.) A rare two foot Egyptian cobra missing from the New York zoo finally found alive and returned to its prison. The deadly vipor never left the zoo and was found near its quarters. (They say the cobra is the deadliest venomous snake in the world. But the Mohave rattler, which I have had the “opportunity” to encounter several times has just as deadly venom, drop for drop.)
And there you have it my faithful readers. The song of the month, to help soothe you back to sanity after reading this mindless shit, is “It Feels Like Rain”, (the live version) by John Hiatt.
Until next month remember Pioneers took bullets, Settlers took Land.
The Honorable, Mindless Professor MR BlueDuck.
