November Blue Duck Weather News 2012

November 2012 Weather News!

Welcome to another award winning edition of Blue Duck Weather! (How is that possible when no one but me has even read the damn thing yet?) Sandy dominated the news almost daily with it’s sad and tragic aftermath of a storm now almost a month now as I write this. One account that amazed me were the record amounts of trees, some one hundred and twenty years old, that were destroyed in New York and New Jersey. With that the quote of the month is quite eloquent. It was written in an AP story about the tree loss. “They fell by the thousands, like soldiers in some vast battle of giants, dropping to the earth in submission to a greater force.” Jim Fitzgerald.

Although Hurricane Katrina killed more people along the Gulf Coast Sandy caused more property damage in an area of the country that is densely populated. FEMA could not bring in emergency trailers for housing as many areas there was just not room for them. With so many apartments and high rises where could a trailer be parked? You will read more about this later.

But, as always, there were other things that happened last month to educate, entertain, amuse you or bore you to death. Read below for a tasty tidbit of the information waiting you.


An elephant that vocalizes human words, the wilderness is dead when the Reavis Ranch trail in Arizona is on the local evening news as a “popular hiking destination”, a critical update on the red squirrel population on Mount Graham in south east Arizona, Mesa, Arizona man pleads guilty to starting an 18,000 acre wildfire last summer, two tons of pigeon shit has to be cleaned up on a church tower, a missing hiker found in the Superstition Mountains three years later (obviously very dead), A Chandler, Arizona couple facing criminal charges for raising chickens in their back yard (are ducks legal?), a very sad story about a family that loses their lives trying to rescue pet dog from the ocean, the official cause of the death of a man eating cockroaches, the metropolitan area in the United States with the most mountain rescues and how the 2012 Hurricane season stacked up (you will be surprised.)

The average temperature at The Land for the month was a beautiful and comfortable 62.18 degrees. The average temperature at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill in New Mexico at 7400’ was 43.41 degrees.

The Land received only .06 of an inch of rain bringing the total rain fall for the year to 5.29”. To date Phoenix has had only 3.41’’, almost three and a half inches below normal.

My beloved Roosevelt Lake continues to shrink with the lack or rain and is 43% full. Lake Mead is holding its own at 51%, Powell at 55% and Lake Pleasant at 53%. (Please perform a peyote ceremony and a rain dance for your desert friends. We are going to dry up and blow away.)


11-1- Power outages from Sandy could last another ten days for hundreds of thousands in New York City, Long Island and New Jersey. Three days after the impact of the storm finding food, water and gas the big challenge. People are even looking for discarded food in dumpsters. Power out to 4.5 million in 14 states and eighty folks have been killed, mostly by drowning and falling trees. The deadliest zone is Staten Island and thirty seven in New York have died, many of them elderly folks. Two small children ripped from their mothers arms by the storm have been found dead.

After suffering the worst disaster in it’s 108 year old history subway services in New York resumed this morning at six. Jersey City has issued a curfew on people driving from seven p.m. to seven a.m. Due to power outages many gas stations aren’t able to pump gas. People lining up for fuel for a mile. Rationing allows ten gallons of fuel for those that are able to find it. The President asks for emergency fuel releases.

Three feet of snow in West Virginia due to the effects of Sandy.

And here in sunny Arizona one of my favorite camping and hunting spots twenty years ago is featured on the local news as a popular hiking destination. The destination is Reavis Ranch on the north side of the Superstition Mountains, an eight mile hike into apple orchards and “paradise”. I knew it was dead ten years ago while hunting deer there. I would be perched above the trail in concealment with rifle and binoculars out. One morning I heard bells and couldn’t figure out what the fuck it was. Up comes “hikers” on the trail with their water bottles, spandex, jingling bells to distract bears (I guess) and noisy conversation. Not one of them knew I had my beady little eyes on them until they rounded boulders out of view and were lumbering on their way. I remember seeing a fine deer in a meadow of grass on one of my perches. I did not dare shoot as I knew the trail and possible “hikers” were on the other side. ( I have not been back since.)

11-2- The death toll raises to 94 from Sandy in the North East and Mid Atlantic. 7400 National Guard have given out 144,000 meals in New York City and Long Island. 5500 folks in New York are in city shelters. Residents of Staten and Coney Island are complaining of aid being too late. “People are defecating in the hall ways.”

Four million still without power and dropping temperatures into the thirties add misery. Some people wait all night for gas. A man in Queens is arrested after he tried to cut in line at a gas station and point a gun at another motorist.

For the first time in history Arizona Public Service and Salt River Project are sending men and equipment to help out in New York.

A smog like haze hangs over parts of Alaska’s Kodiak Island this week and the result is a volcano eruption that happened one hundred years ago. Strong winds and lack of snow have stirred ash from the largest volcanic blast of the 20th century in 1912.

11-3- Under increasing pressure, as thousands are still devastated by Sandy, the annual NYC Marathon has been canceled. 47,000 runners from around the world were scheduled to begin the race in hard hit Staten Island. Storm victims were being evicted from hotels to make way for the runners and their reservations.

With temperatures expected to fall in the thirties tonight power is still out for 2.3 million people in the North East.

National park rangers are trying to rescue a hiker in the Great Smokey Mountains in Tennessee. The Appalacian Trail hiker got into trouble in four to five feet snow drifts left by “Superstorm Sandy.” The man used his cell phone to call 9-11 two days ago. Yesterday morning he called again and said he was hunkered down in his location and might not be able to get out.

An elephant in a South Korean zoo reproduces five Korean words by tucking his trunk inside his mouth to modulate sounds. An international team of scientists went to the zoo to confirm this unprecedented phenomenon.

11-4- Twenty five thousand blankets passed out in New York. The National Guard is passing out free gas in Brooklyn. Five thousand gallon trucks from the Department of Defense dispatched in five locations in New York City. Even and odd numbered license plates designate altering days to get gas in New Jersey. (This has not happened since the fuel shortage in the seventies.)

Seven hundred thousand still without power in NYC, six days after the storm, and temperatures are falling with another storm coming. New York governor says “its going to become increasingly clear that home without heat are uninhabitable.’’ Bloomberg states that housing will have to be provided for thirty to forty thousand people. Two million people in the North East are still without power.

11-5- Eight hundred thousand still without power in New Jersey, including schools. One hundred and thirty seven miles of shoreline have been devastated. “Impactful” Nor’easter on the way.

11-6- “Sandy’s next crisis”: Thousands need housing and two hundred million dollars in emergency housing assistance has been dispensed by the federal government. The tactics that FEMA have used in the past for emergency housing will be difficult to place in a densely populated city. Trailer space is not an option when so many live in apartment buildings. Thirty four thousand people in New York and New Jersey have been put up in hotels and motels.

Staten Island is in desperate need for underwear. Other clothing donations have exceeded generous. “It’s like a third world nation” one person said of the destruction on the island’s south shore.

The World Trade Center Memorial reopens after floodwaters are pumped out from a high water mark of ten feet at the sixteen acre site.

A trainer in Billings, Montana is mauled to death cleaning the pen of two five hundred pound brown bears. He has extensive wounds that make it impossible to determine if he was conscious during the attack and able to defend himself. He had no defensive wounds and had not deployed his pepper spray. There is speculation he may have fallen and hit his head before being killed.

11-7- Nor’easter comes after Sandy’s destruction in NYC. There are new power outages and twelve hundred flights are canceled across the North East. Bloomberg orders three nursing homes and adult care facilities to be evacuated in Queens. 620 people removed and 672,000 still without power.

“Code Blue” across New Jersey for anyone who needs shelter and needs to get warm. “Snowing like January.”

One man says he plans to ride out the latest storm in his apartment even after he saw cars floating by his front door last week. As the water receeded men dressed in dark clothing broke down his door. They were surprised to see him and other residenst inside. The men said they were rescue workers but took off.
The man has put up a handmade sign that reads “Have gun. Will shoot U” and uses a bed frame to barricade the front door. He has gas and boils water to give out warmth.

11-8- 50mph wind gusts and snow knock out power to 167,000 homes and businesses in New Jersey, 50,000 in Long Island. 4.4’’ of snow in Central Park , a record for this date. Record 6’’ in Newark, New Jersey. Bridgeport, Connecticut 3.5’’ breaking a record of 2” set in 1953.

760,000 still without power. Thirty eight percent of stations in NYC still have no gasoline. Rationing with even and odd number license plates will begin in New York tomorrow like New Jersey had to do.

11-9- Weather Alert issued for the state of Arizona. Five inches of snow in Sunrise. Hail in Flagstaff.

By new weather reporting standards by the NWS (you read it here first) the first winter storm for the western U.S. is named Brutus. Blizzard conditions are on the way and wind gusts of 85mph in Salt Lake City with snow this morning.

11-10- As the first big cold front of the winter season slams the West, four feet of snow in Helena, Montana. Lake effect snow in Western Nevada, south east of Lake Tahoe. Top wind gust of 111mph at Meteor Crater in Arizona.

Here at The Land we had the first significant wind chill, 61 degrees plus a 15mph wind resulted in a high temperature of just 55 degrees. Talking Trees and Antelope Hill in New Mexico had wind and snow with a fucking freezing low of 16 degrees.

Hurricane Sandy’s relief efforts by the Red Cross and Salvation Army will be the largest since Hurricane Katrina. The Red Cross has sent 5,800 workers, served 3.2 million meals and snacks and provide 110,000 emergency shelters.
317,000 people have registered with FEMA for financial help. As of yesterday 470,000 people in New York and New Jersey still have no electricity.

Tensions are boiling over almost two weeks later on parts of Long Island One “protestor” carries a sign that reads “We are cold and we are tired. We want our power now.”

The Coney Island Aquarium was flooded in the disaster, home to 12,000 fish and marine mammals. Holding tanks and heating equipment were lost, but due to rescue efforts 90% of the animals and fish are saved.

And here in the sunny desert climate a south east valley girl was bitten by a rabid bat last weekend and receiving treatment.

11-11- Yesterday’s storm dropped a half inch of rain to an inch and a half in Gold Canyon and Queen Creek, Arizona. With only .05’’ of rain at The Land, once it cleared out, this morning was the first 32 degree low of the season. Talking Trees and Antelope Hill had a low of 9 degrees! Zero at The Grand Canyon!

From his secluded location in Colorado RyDuck reports a temperature with wind-chill of 10 degrees!

Alarmed that rebel militias are profiting from a sharp increase in the slaughter and poaching of elephants and rhinos, the U.S. plans to build a global coalition to combat illegal wildlife trade.

And right here in the sunny Arizona, Peoria Police and Maricopa County Animal Control receiving calls about “strange acting” coyotes near homes, schools and parks. (Just shoot the conniving bastards!)

11-12- Two weeks after Sandy 90% of Long Island still without power. Five thousand people in New Jersey, New York and Connecticut are in shelters.

The 6th worst flooding in a 150 years chases tourists from Venice.

11-14- Two Arizona utilities are working sixteen hours a day to help restore power to Long Island, New York. There are eight utility companies there from California, Arizona and Nevada.

The Tiber River in Rome is flooded from rain and flooding suburbs. One of the city’s most historic bridges closed today. St. Mark’s Square under so much water tourists swim there.

Three mountain lions close together photographed in Sabino Canyon, Tucson Arizona.

11-15- Despite recent moisture three quarters of Kansas, South Dakota and Nebraska are under extreme or exceptional drought conditions.

The annual survey shows that red squirrels are holding steady at about 215 on Mount Graham in south east Arizona. ( If you have any idea how vast this mountain range is that is not many squirrels. I can see why they are on the endangered species list.)

11-16- Near Fire Island, New York Hurricane Sandy exposed a ninety year old shipwreck. The “Bessie White” was a four mast Canadian schooner. The ship went down in heavy fog in 1919 or 1922.

11-17- Forty five hundred tons of debris wash up at Queens Park in New York from Sandy. Three hundred and fifty homes in Nork City are beyond saving, eighty in Breezy Point alone from the damge of Sandy.

11-20- A Mesa, Arizona man has pleaded guilty as the cause of the 18,000 acre Sunflower Fire last summer. He used a “flame throwing” shotgun and shot at a box in the timber near Payson. As part of his defense he called 9-11 from his cell phone to report the fire and was told to leave the scene.

Record rain and wind from a powerful storm in the North West from Washington to Oregon. The Seattle-Tacoma International Airport received 2.13’’ of rain, shattering the old record of 1.23’’ for this date in 1962.

In parts of western Washington seven inches of rain fell in two days.
In Oregon an Elk hunter was killed when a tree fell on his tent from winds. Peak wind gusts of 101mph recorded. 20,000 without power.

11-21- Some of New Jersey’s beaches lost half their sand during Hurricane Sandy. The average state beach is thirty to forty feet narrower. The shore town of Mantoloking lost one hundred and fifty feet of beach.

For the first time since 1998 water will flow the entire 1450 miles of the Colorado River all the way from Yuma to the Gulf of California in Mexico. Arizona and six other states sign a water sharing deal with Mexico. This will also help Arizona’s defense agains drought.

The debris from Sandy on the beaches of New Jersey will take months to clean up. On a normal day the city of Hoboken averages sixty tons of trash per day. Workers are now hauling three hundred tons per day (the question in my mind is where?)

11-22- 26,500 Thanksgiving meals passed out at thirty sites in New York neighborhoods affected by Sandy.

One hundred vehicles in south east Texas on Interstate 10 collide in dense fog killing two and injuring fifty one. Before the pile up many vehicles were driving close to the posted speed limit of 70mph despite the foggy conditions. (You have got to be kidding me. Is there no common sense anymore?)

The FCC announces a series of hearings to find ways of widespread communication losses in disasters, such as Sandy. Even first responders and emergency managers lose communication.

11-23- Hurricane Sandy destroyed or damaged 113,000 trees in New York City and New Jersey, more than any storm on record. Some of the trees were one hundred and twenty years old.

The sand dunes that saved Fire Island, New York from the full impact of Sandy are gone but 4,000 structures survived. Some dunes, up to twenty feet high are washed away.

And here in sunny Arizona in November with temperatures in the low eighties two female hikers rescued off of Squaw Peak in Phoenix, suffering from dehydration. (Give me a break! Thankfully they weren’t hiking in August!)

In Crescent City, California fifty four million dollars is being spent to build the West Coast’s first harbor to withstand the type of tsunami expected to strike every fifty years. It happened in 2011 when the highest surge in the boat basin measured 8.1 feet and currents at 22 feet per second.

244 new steel pilings will be thirty inches in diameter and seventy feet long, with thirty feet sunk into bedrock. The pilings will extend eighteen feet above the water so surges plus or minus seven and a half feet will not rip docks loose.

11-24- Three more hiker rescues on Squaw Peak in Phoenix. At eighty five degrees one was carrying no water and one was wearing no shoes! ( I just don’t even have a fucking comment on this one.)

After all of the recent and violent weather in the United States climate activists hope the U.S. will be more “than a disinterested bystander” when the U.N. climate talks resume in two days.

With a re-elected President “I think there will be expectations from countries to hear a new voice from the U.S.” the director of climate and energy program said.

11-25- “A Fight For Chickens”. A Chandler, Arizona family is facing “criminal charges” for keeping nine chickens in their backyard. All they want to do is provide nutritious additive free eggs for their children. (Don’t cities have better things to do with their lawyers?)

11-26- Superstition Search and Rescue find human remains in the Superstition Mountains after three years of searching. The volunteer group found the remains in a crack in the mountain thirty five feet above ground about a half mile from the tent site of a hiker that went missing three years ago.

11-27- There are more mountain park rescues in the Phoenix metro area than any other city in the United States.

Three hikers lost and one injured while searching for the perfect Christmas tree in the Apache Sitgreaves National Forest in Arizona. Fortunately two of them made it to a forest service road before sunset and sought help. A call for help brought a DPS helicopter to the location of the injured hiker who had started a signal fire.

The Coast Guard ended a search yesterday for a boy whose parents were killed when the three tried to rescue their dog from strong surf in northern California. Ten foot waves pulled the dog into the ocean three days ago as it ran to retrieve a a stick. The boy went in after the dog. The father went in the ocean to help. The boy made it back but then he and his mom went out to help dad. All lost their lives. (sad, sad Thanksgiving weekend story.)

An autopsy has determined that a man that choked to death after eating dozens of roaches during a “contest” at a Florida pet store in October. The grand prize winner was to receive a python.

After more than a month with no electricity for folks in part of New York City they have received electric bills. The bills were based on last year’s electric useage.

11-28- Seven days of rain in Wales cause the Clwyd River to burst its banks. Parts of England also flooded.

Debris from the Tsunami almost two years ago in Japan are piling up in Hawaii. There is twenty tons of plastic and other shit on a ten mile stretch of beach. Every bird and fish caught has shreds of plastic inside when opened up.

11-29- Tomorrow will be the end of the Atlantic, Caribbean hurricane season where this year the most devastation has been by water, not wind. The National Hurricane Center is ramping up efforts to develop new tide surge warnings.

Large, early snowstorm drops eight inches of snow in twenty four hours in Moscow. This represents half of typical amounts of snow for all of November.

“Melting Away”- Polar ice in Greenland has shrunk five times the pace of the 1990s. Rising ocean levels made Sandy worse with storm surges.

11-30- The second of a series of storms slams Northern California today as heavy rains and strond winds knocked out power, ties up traffic and causes flooding. North Bay received seven inches of rain and Napa County six inches.

Seventy flights cancelled in San Fancisco and the famous bridge with the same name losing all lighting, causing thee hour traffic delays. One foot of snow in the Sierra Nevadas.

One month later folks without housing and electricity in Staten Island, New York feel abandoned and ignored.

And that concludes another outstanding edition of Blue Duck Weather. With Christmas approaching please reach out to the poor folks in New York and New Jersey who are still devastated by the monster Sandy.

Your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather will leave you with the song of the month; “Eye of the Hurricane” by David Wilcox.

As Always your humble, Distinguished, Professor of Quackery,
MR Blue Duck

October 2012 Blue Duck Weather News

October 2012 Weather News!

Welcome to another outstanding edition of Blue Duck Weather! Keep those hits coming to make sure this is the most frequently read weather news on the planet! Our viewing audience is growing rapidly with the incredible reporting your fine staff brings to you. Examples below are just a tiny piece of the cosmic puzzle my faithful readers.

A new method adopted by the Weather Channel to report winter storms, little known fact about one of last month’s tropical storms, grass thieves due to the drought, how it shaped up for rattlesnakes on The Land this spring and summer, one place that went from wildfires to snow in five days, a squirrel account that the Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck will smile at, bug invasion in one town turns to insanity, the possibility’s of approaching Hurricane Sandy, The President of the United States advised on the potential destruction of Hurricane Sandy, a shark that fell out of the sky on a southern California golf course and so much more in this latest edition of Blue Duck Weather.

This month’s weather news seemed fairly tame in comparison until about October 25th. Sandy was born as an usual tropical storm and your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather is cautious about “predictions” because many do not pan out and make for (more) boring reading. Once I read that the President was advised about the possible destruction of Sandy in the “Situation Room”, once I saw the computer models (the European model nailed the storm’s energy and path) I began to watch this thing blow up like a nuclear bomb.

Super storm Sandy, the perfect storm Sandy, once in a generation Sandy, Franken storm Sandy, only a Category 1 hurricane but with lowest barometric pressure and outflow winds in recorded history. Yes, “only” a category one storm but with enough force to extend one thousand miles, cause unprecedented snow inland and with twelve foot high waves on Lake Michigan, made my feathered pinholes of ears perk up. This one was going to be a monster. And I am sure the effects will be felt for many months to come. And in the coming weeks, long after Sandy is gone from front line news your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather will be giving you information on all of its impact.

But first the necessary statistics that began this “scientific” weather journal.
The average temperature on The Land in October was 73.72 degrees, 15 degrees cooler at the end of the month than the beginning. Talking Trees and Antelope Hill had an average of 52.88 degrees and was only 7 degrees cooler.

No rain in October and the total for the year on The Land is 5.24 inches.
And the ever important, if not life saving lake water reports for the arid South West are as follows: Lake Mead, 51% full, Powell 57%, Pleasant only 39%, and poor old Roosevelt Lake at 44%! This leads us to the appropriate quote of the month. “But oh my desert yours is the only death I cannot bear.”
Richard Shelton


10-1- Two records this year for bald eagles in Arizona; the number of nests and the number of eggs. Sixty six breeding areas have been documented and eighty eggs.

Powerful Typhoon Jelawat headed toward Tokyo after causing black outs in southern and western Japan.

The amount of coral reef in Australia’s Great Barrier Reef has been cut in half since 1985, two thirds since 1995 Tropical storms, coral predation, warming water and pollution account for 48%.

10-2- Your Editor in Chief doesn’t hold much stock in long term weather forecasts but the next ninety days for Arizona is likely to be wetter. (Let’s hope so.)

“During the upcoming 2012-13 winter season the Weather Channel will name note worthy storms. Our goal is to better communicate the threat and timing of the significant impacts that accompany these events. The fact is, a storm with a name is easier to follow, which will mean fewer surprises and more preparation.” Winter storms have been named in Europe since 1950.

10-3- There hasn’t been much news about Tropical Storm Nadine since it is so far away from the U.S. but after forming twenty days ago it has become one of the top five lasting cyclones in the Atlantic. It is headed to the Azores Islands in the north Atlantic.

With the ongoing drought grass thieves are “sprouting” in New Mexico. Some ranchers have started cutting neighbor’s fences or leaving gates open so their own cattle can graze on greener land. (Get a rope!)

From his secluded location in Colorado RyDuck reports a high of 82 degrees dropping to 40 degrees in five hours. Snow expected.

Tropical Storm Oscar, fifteenth named storm of the season has formed in the eastern Atlantic. It is 1220 miles west, north west of the Cape Verde Islands.
Tropical Storm Nadine dies in the Atlantic short of the longest active tropical storm on record.

Here comes Winter! Up to six inches of snow in Fargo, North Dakota and portions of Montana.

Arizona Game and Fish are analyzing a trail camera photo taken in Tucson of either a rare jaguar or ocelot. The photo was taken on September 23 by a hunter. Four of the last five sightings have been by Arizona hunters.

10-5- Rare October snowstorm for North Dakota to Minnesota with fourteen inches in some areas. Grand Forks, North Dakota had a record for this date of 3.5” breaking the old record set in1950. Six inches fell in Karlstad, Minnesota just after residents were forced out of their homes by wildfires earlier this week.

10-6- Heartbreaking! A landslide in China kills eighteen children in a school buried by the mud.

A man in Orem, Utah called police after he received a call on his cell phone from his home phone. He thought it was a burgler. He later discovered his pooch had grabbed the receiver and pushed redial as he was burying it in the backyard.

10-7- Many mountain lions are migrating west from Nevada into California. One theory is the Sierra in California has lusher habitat and greater selection of prey than the arid mountains of Nevada. The cat population is estimated to be almost double of Nevada, almost six thousand. Hunting lions is legal in Nevada, illegal in California. ( My theory is they are moving to get away from the shooters!)



10-9- There is a severe apple shortage due to spring freezes resulting in the smallest crops since 1986. Production is down 52% in New York and a whopping 90% in Michigan.

The Shinook salmon are making a big come back in Klemuth, California. 380,000 have doubled the record since 1978.

10-10- Due to the drought from the Dakotas to Oklahoma, cities are seeing more skunks. One animal control officer said they usually catch two skunks a week, but over the last three weeks 13.

10-11- The entire state of Arizona is under a Weather Alert with rain, snow, wind and tornadic activity possible

Tropical Storm Patty forms in the Atlantic east of the Bahamas. Is it the 16th named storm of the season.

The north Pole has been losing ice in the water but the south Pole is gaining reaching a record of 7.51 million square miles in September.

Natural disasters have been raising dramatically around the world since 1980 but the trend is steepest for North America with hurricanes, tornadoes, floods, record heat and drought.

Flagstaff, Arizona police are looking for the sick bastard who hung a puppy outside of its dog house. The owner returned home, found the poor thing and cut the noose so her children wouldn’t see it.

And from the I swear we don’t make this shit up file: Raw chicken parts fall out of the sky on a horse back rider in Virginia. Thanfully she was wearing a riding helmet. The Virginia Department of Environmental Quality will investigate. ( I would rather deal with flying pigs or blimps. “Willie, it’s a blimp, Willie! That insane memory is from a “song” by Captain Beefheart. In this case it should be Captain Chickenheart.)

10-12- Last night’s storm brought a half inch or rain to Mesa, .82” in Cave Creek, the first snow in Flagstaff and the high temperature in the Phoenix area down to 73 degrees. We have not had highs in the seventies since last April.

Heavy rain and flooding in large amounts of Scotland bursting river banks and turning roads into rivers. Britain warned the region to brace for a month’s worth of rain in 48 hours. Thirty flood warnings are in effect.

10-13- Tornado Watches in parts of Oklahoma and Tennessee.

10-15- The one hundred acre Big Canyon Fire is burning fourteen miles east of Payson two miles from the Tonto Fish Hatchery. The cause is not known but cooler temperatures should help fires in the rugged terrain.

Tropical Storm Paul quickly turns into a hurricane and a Watch is posted for parts of Baja, California. The storm’s center is 530 miles south of the southern tip of the Baja.

Tropical Storm Rafeal tracking toward Bermuda after drenching the Caribbean’s Leeward Islands.

10-16- Paul blew up into a Category 3 storm last night but has weakened as it is close to landfall in Mexico’s Baja, California. Up to ten inches of rain in some places. A Warning is issued from Santa Fe north to Punta Abrejos.

Squirrel populations explode in parts of Vermont due to a mild winter and a good nut crop. One Orchardist says he hasn’t seen such infestations in thirty three years on sixty farms. The little bastards will wait until an apple crop is nearly ripe and then swarm into trees sometimes eating half the tree’s fruit in two or three hours.

10-17- The first Freeze Warning of the season issued for eastern Arizona.

Fifty homes are evacuated near Santa Barbara due to a wildfire. The fire began at eight this morning and has doubled in two hours.

Paul weakens to a Tropical Storm as is skirts Baja, California this morning.

Boxelder bug invasion in Portage, Utah. They are everywhere, on children, dogs, in the food, in the basements and along window sills. People are just beside themselves. (And Mrs. Blue Duck thought the flies were bad at the end of the summer.)

10-18- Five unconfirmed tornadoes in Mississippi and Arkansas. Two homes destroyed and thousands without power.

Up to 60mph winds knock out power to 50,000 in Denver, Fort Collins and Greeley two days ago. 5500 still without power.

The wildfire in Santa Barbara is 75% contained at forty four acres in a heavily populated area. It may have started by a downed power line.

Drought, frost and hail have combined to make Europe’s wine grape harvest the worst in 50 years. Crop harvest will be down 20% in France and Italy.

10-19- The tiny town of Bucyrus, North Dakota is all but destroyed by a wildfire fanned by 70mph winds burns 6,000 acres. The drought is to blame and one woman lost her home of forty five years. Twenty seven other residents are displaced.

This one sounds like the Arizona desert in the summer or perhaps the Dust Bowl in the thirties: Dust storms in northern Oklahoma shut down I-35 for several hours after three dozen vehicles pile up. Fourteen injured. One state trooper said he had never seen anything like it in thirty years.

10-20- It has been raining for five days in Lourdes, France. Parts of the city in front of the Basilica are flooded with up to five feet of water. Hundreds of pilgirms are evacuated since the grotto is under water.

Due to a cold Alaska storm moving south into California a tornado touched down north of Sacremento yesterday. Two feet of snow in the highest elevations of the Sierra Nevada. Chains required on Highway 50 south of Lake Tahoe. With winds up to 80 mph a Winter Storm Warning is issued for elevations above 5500’.

10-23- Tropical Storm Sandy develops and on course to Jamaica. Hurricane Warnings are issued.

10-24- Three hundred and eighty folks are evacuated west of Pueblo, Colorado as a wildfire has burned 1700 acres and twelve structures. Winds of up to 50 mph are not helping and the fire is at zero containment.

Sandy turns into a hurricane and hits Jamaica. All schools are closed and shelters set up.

Tropical Storm Tony forms in the Atlantic.

10-24- Major flooding in Istanbul, Turkey damaging homes and crops. Three are dead from flash flooding.

10-25- Forty nine degree low on The Land with a sixty nine degree high. It is about fucking time! Twenty two degree low at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill. Ooshy.

Hurricane Sandy strikes Cuba with 105mph winds knocking out power to the entire city of Havana and damaging homes. This powerful storm has a 90% chance of hitting the north east U.S. next week. The lead forecaster with the National Weather Service said “It’s going to be a high impact event.” Some models showing Sandy doing more damage than last year’s Irene. It may affect fifty million people.

10-26- State of Emergency declared in New Jersey as Sandy looms in the distance. All ships in Norfolk, Virginia sent to sea as a precaution.

10-27- Sandy “powers” toward the Eastern Seaboard. Tropical storm force winds extend for 650 miles. States of Emergencies declared in eight states. Evacuations ordered along some coastal areas, including Atlantic City tomorrow afternoon.

10-28- “U.S. superstorm threat launches evacuations.” “1991 perfect storm skipper leery of Sandy.”

Hundreds of thousands are ordered to evacuate, a possible threat to fifty to sixty million people. Closure of New York City subway, bus and commuter rail begins today at seven p.m. All NYC schools closed tomorrow. 375,000 evacuated off Long Island, New York. Federal government closing all offices tomorrow.

10-29- Sandy’s death toll in the Caribbean up to sixty five souls, fifty one of them in Haiti. Bridges have collapsed, banana crops ruined and homes under water.

And Sandy slams the United States: 2.8 million without power. Schools, offices, roads and transit shut down across an area of fifty million people. Parts of the Atlantic and New Jersey under five feet of water. According to the governor of New Jersey “Rescue is no longer an option.” 10,000 flights cancelled. The coastal tide in New Jersey is thirteen feet high, three feet higher than Hurricane Irene last year.

Being called a freak storm Hurricane Sandy matches no other model in history. Record storm surges in New York City. Hurricane force winds from New York to Virginia. Water beginning to enter the New York subways in Manhatten. No photos are coming from north of NYC due to power outages.
The first time in 124 years the New York Stock Exchange is closed for two days in a row.

And here in sunny Phoenix, Arizona three hikers are stung by swarms of bees. One hiker falls to his death. The young man had just enlisted to join the Marines. Rescuers had to wear bee suits and were stung themselves. The other two hikers managed to hunker down in some rocks but were stung hundreds of times. They are expected to survive.

10-30- On the front page of the Arizona Republic: “Superstorm Sandy slams the Eastern Seaboard.” Wall Street swamped, Boardwalk is damaged, record thirteen foot tidal surge at the southern tip of Manhatten, a construction crane collapsed on top of a luxury high rise building with winds estimated at 90mph.

“Sandy’s mammoth wake: 40 dead, millions without power. Once in a generation hurricane.” Twenty states from New England to Tennessee without power. Massive fire destroys one hundred homes in Queens, New York. Ten subways under the East River in New York are flooded. Four towns in north New Jersey are under six feet of water after a levee breaks. Six nuclear power plants are closed, all of New York City’s airports are closed and fifteen thousand flights are cancelled.

From the effects of Sandy there is a full blown blizzard, after mixing with colder air from the north, in West Virginia and North Carolina. Fourteen to sixteen inces of snow on the Newfoundland Gap on the Tennesse, North Carolina line, biggest October snow fall on record.

Alhough Sandy never grew to more than a Category 1 hurricane its center had the lowest barometric pressure ever recorded in the northern hemisphere. This means it had enough sustained force to become one thousand miles wide and produce the damage that it caused.

And here in sunny Arizona the Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck spots a rattlesnake on the road near The Land. She also told me for the first time rural area trick or treaters should be on the lookout for rattlesnakes. ( I was going to comment in this edition of Blue Duck Weather about the lack of rattlesnakes on the Land this summer. But I did not want to comment too early. I suppose it is a bitter sweet relationship with the bastards. Not one did I see all summer. But I also saw few quail, hardly any prairie dogs and other food that snakes consume. I know I have killed so many snakes over the years, mainly because I didn’t want family and pets bitten. But it seems to be a sad irony to me. I can’t say I miss them, but the lack of them worries me for environmental reasons. Too little rain to support their food sources, too many people driving them away, or possibly to many people like me who shoot them on site. Now that I write this I will probably get bitten, caught off guard by cooler temperatures. In a just world it would probably serve me right.)

10-31- Halloween cancelled in New Jersey. Two million without power as the President visits. The New Jersey coastline is changed forever. 20,000 in Hoboken trapped by high water.

The famous Belleview hospital in New York City evacuated patients due to lack of running water. Nork York City is cut in half and a quarter of a million people are still without power. Mile long wait and hours for gasoline in New Jersey and New York.

And here in Arizona Dish Satellite employees are stung by bees in Maricopa and had to be airlifted to Phoenix.

Until next month, whether you are stung by bees or caught in “the storm of a century” remember Pioneers took bullets. Settlers took land.

With humility in serving our fine readers, MR Blue Duck

Blue Duck Weather News, September 2012

September 2012 Weather News!

Welcome to another exciting edition of Blue Duck Weather. I would like to take a moment to show gratitude to the brilliance of the Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck. It is she (not me of course) who set up this fantastic weather blog! To date there have been 5,119 page views of this incredible blog worldwide! From the United States to the Netherlands and Russia folks around the world are discovering the real truth in weather journalism. Please pass the torch and share Blue Duck Weather with your friends, enemies, uncles and aunts. Post a comment and I promise you will receive a reply from your brilliant Editor in Chief of this fine publication. Thank you so much for your support and readership.


In this exciting edition of Blue Duck Weather you will read the following:
Eighty three thousand dollars to treat a woman for scorpion stings in Chandler, Arizona, the long lasting effects and damage of even a “minor” hurricane, thousands of dead, huge swamp rats wash onto shore after Issac, worldwide health alert for visitors this summer at Yosemite National Park, west Sedona, Arizona bear encounter, the actual place the hottest temperature on the planet was recorded and when, the last roaring gasp of Arizona’s monsoon season (not by the official calendar date), where we can get enough energy to power the world, BP makes the news again with more oil turning up on Gulf Coast beaches, a little known fact about the distinction between hurricanes and typhoons, a wildfire churning up radiation from old mines, bizarre fire tornadoes, a half billion dollar weather tracking satellite fails for “no reason”, a man who jumps into a tiger cage to “become one” with the beast, a town of one hundred thousand in Texas about to impose water restrictions so severe they will ban the use of fresh water to fill swimming pools and more news you never knew or cared about.

The average temperature on The Land in September was 81.68 degrees and it was twelve degrees cooler at the end of the month than the beginning. Hallelujah! The average temperature at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill was 60.89 degrees. Summer is ending!

The Land received 1.47” of rain in September. We have had enough rain this monsoon season to sprout real, live dense patches of grass despite the heat. For the last several years the desert has looked like a moonscape except for the ever present mesquite, palo verde and creosote. For the year The Land has received 5.24” of rain, most of it during this monsoon. To date Phoenix has received 3.36” of rain.

You will read more in this edition about the effects of the monsoon runoff and the surrounding lakes but it ain’t pretty for my beloved Roosevelt Lake; 51% full, Pleasant is 55% full, Mead 50% and Powell 58%. Now let’s get on with the Weather News!


9-1- Residents of St. Tammany Parish north of New Orleans on Lake Pontchartrain are ordered today to evacuate immediately. According to authorities the failure of a lock along a canal is “imminent.” Three hundred and sixty thousand people are still without power from Issac.

Drought stricken Missouri and Illinois receive some much needed rain relief from the remnants of Issac.

Most of Montana has had a dry, scorched summer. There are ten uncontained fires burning in the state. The 19 Mile wildfire has destroyed a dozen homes.
This is Billings hottest summer on record with 47 days with temperatures above ninety degrees. The normal is 29.

Three people in Idaho are electrocuted in a ditch trying to rescue a dog.

Some Cape Cod beaches are closed this Labor Day weekend due to shark sightings.

9-3- Two rescued on Camelback Mountain in Phoenix by helicopter due to dehydration.

Wildfires in Nebraska and South Dakota triple in size from three days ago.

4,000 acres on fire in the Angelis National Forest. Twelve thousand people, including campers for the holiday weekend, are forced to evacuate.

Six days after Issac first hit 125,000 still without power in Louisiana. 2500 still in shelters. 65,000 people have applied for Disaster relief.

9-4- One inch of rain last night in a brief amount of time in Apache Junction, Arizona. Flooding in San Carlos and Kearny.

9-5- St. Mary’s Food Bank in Phoenix has sent 41,000 pounds of emergency food and baby formula to a New Orleans food bank. This was done despite supplies down 50% compared with last year.

La Place, Louisiana is blaming fortified New Orleans levees for pushing flood waters into outlying areas. 17,000 homes are damaged from Issac.

Heavy rain, up to three inches hit’s the East Coast from Issac.

Tropical Storm Michael, continues to grow in the Atlantic.

Leslie, the 6th named storm forms in the Atlantic. It is 465 miles south west of Bermuda.

Twenty thousand dead swamp rats wash up on the beaches of Mississippi. The surge of water from Issac drowned them. They are a giant rodent introduced from South Africa. Most are glad to see the giant fuckers dead! (Mrs. Blueduck would like to know why anyone would want to see them alive and why would you introduce giant swamp rats to our country?)

9-6- At approximately five p.m. this afternoon .60’’ of rain fell on The Land in about twenty minutes. As your official weather spotter it was my duty to report it to the National Weather Service. Their guidelines are to report anything over one half inch of rain in thirty minutes. Needless to say it flooded with water making the desert look like a lake and the streets turned into torrential rain runoff. I can always tell when it is “no man’s land” and for how long. Until the lights of cars crawling their way down the road, hours after flooding, do I know it is time to give the Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck the “green light” to come on home when she is caught north of this mess.
There was also a fifteen degree drop in temperature in fifteen minutes.

Thirteenth Dust Storm Warning in Phoenix this summer. A wall of dirt twenty miles wide overtakes the Valley like a crawling halocaust. Flights from Sky Harbor conduct “ground stops” and are not allowed to take off.

Rain helps with the 4180 acre wildfire in the San Gabriel Mountains north east of Los Angeles.

9-7- A wild weather morning in the east Valley and Tucson, Arizona! Three inches of rain in Mesa at Broadway and Higley. Sixty five nursing home patients had to be moved out of flooded rooms. One school cancels football game. A fifty two year old woman was swept to her death in a flooded wash in Tucson. Her husband managed to escaped the car with a broken pelvis and was rescued alive.

2.91 inches of rain recorded at Sky Harbor Airport for the monsoon season so far, above the normal average of 2.77”.

Last night’s “massive dust cloud billows over Phoenix skies” makes national news.

A family hiking in west Sedona encounters an “aggressive” black bear and her cubs within twenty feet. The woman was terrified and used “moutain lion roars’’ to scare the poor bears away.

A world wide alert is issued for visitors to Yosemite National Park this summer. 29,000 people are at risk of contracting the Hanti Virus and two have died so far. The infections have been located to park cabins and tents.

9-8- High dew points in Arizona have persisted lately and according to one meteorologist they may persist through the winter. “Our dew points have stayed elevated as we are transitioning into El Nino condition could mean a wetter winter.”

Hurricane Leslie downgraded to a tropical storm in the Atlantic on a path toward Bermuda.

A rare tornado swept out of the ocean hit’s a beach front neighborhood in New York City today causing damage.

Two adults and an infant died in their mobile home after it was blown into a ravine in Nowata County, Oklahoma. Another man was killed when straight line winds flipped his semi onto a cement barrier trapping him inside. 17,790 people without power.

A cussing cockatoo violates noise law in Warwick, Rhode Island. Neighbors complain that the bird constantly cusses them out. But the neighbor’s just happen to be the woman who owns the cockatoo’s ex husband and his girl friend.

9-9- Flooding kills 132 folks in Nigeria and has displaced 36,331 people since July. (And we think our monsoon season gets rough.)

9-10- Sixty power poles down from high winds in Yuma, Arizona thousands without power.

There are 110 fires burning in central Washington state.

Idaho’s 408 square mile Mustang Complex fires are still burning after being started by lightning in July. Just yesterday hundreds evacuated.

9-11- NEVER FORGET THIS FATEFUL DATE!

A cool high of 77 degrees at The Land today with .64 inches of rain in the last twenty four hours. The total this month is 1.47 inches. Let’s try and kill the fucking drought we have been in for twelve years.

So far 2012 is the hottest on record for the United States.

Two women arrested in Pima County, Arizona flood rescues. Both, in separate incidents, are charged with reckless driving with children on board into flooded washes. They are also being charged for child abuse.

A new study claims there is enough energy in the wind to satisfy the world’s energy needs.

9-12- Flash flooding in Vegas with 45 homes damaged in the south east part of the town. 1.75 inches was recorded downtown, the wettest day on record.
The California deserts, Utah and Navajo Land near Tuba City also hit hard. Highway 260 near Tuba City is closed. One hundred and fifty miles south east of Los Angeles in Coachella Valley one storm dumped 5.51’’ of rain in one night, more than their annual average rainfall.
A dike breaches in Santa Clara, Utah and thirty homes are evacuated.

BP wants to “aggressively” clean up oil exposed on Louisianna beaches by Hurricane Issac. This is remnants of buried oil from the massive well blow on April 20th, 2010. ( They have been spending millions of dollars on ad campaings on National news welcoming all of us to the Gulf Coast and how pristine it is. Someone once told me “the Devil is in the details.” Well, let me tell you the Devil is buried deep in the water and sand polluting every living thing is it exposed to.)

A nineteen year old fisherman in Sitka, Alaska spends the night in a four foot by four foot plastic fish bin after his boat was hit by waves, overturned and sank. A Coast Guard helicopter rescued him twenty four hours after his “chilly” ordeal.

Leslie moves out to sea after pounding Newfoundland with wind and rain. Thousands are without power and all flights at the island’s main airport are cancelled.

9-13- The Hopi Tribe in Tuba City, Arizona declare a State of Emergency from flooding.

Nearly one hundred years later, California’s Death Valley has been recognized as having the hottest all time record high on the planet. It was 134 degrees on July 10th, 1913.

National health officials are convinced this is the worst year on record for West Nile virus deaths in the U.S. since it hit in 1999. 1405 serious illnesses and 118 deaths have been reported across the country, mainly in Texas.

As the tourist season winds down eight people have died visiting the Grand Canyon this year. Most deaths are accidental, including falls, heat strokes and drowning. Suicides are also recorded every year. Last year there were twenty one fatalities, the highest in ten years.

9-14- Typhoon Sanba heading for Okinawa and South Korea with 145 mph winds, equivalent to a Category 4 hurricane. Earlier this week 178 mph winds made it a Super Typhoon. (Interesting fact: Named storms west of the International dateline in the Pacific north west ocean are called typhoons, not hurricanes.)


Highway 264 east of Tuba City, Arizona has been reopened after flooding washed over a bluff and washed out six feet of dirt below the road closing it.

Tropical Storm Kristy causing life threatening surf and rip currents off the coast of southern Baja, California and south west Mexico. (Surfers, grab your boards!)

9-15- Typhoon Sanba unleashes torrential rains in Manila and Okinawa with streets under six feet of water.

The eighth hurricane of the season, Nadine is born in the Atlantic east of Bermuda.

9-17- Typhoon Sanba pounds North and South Korea with heavy rain. One dead, 170 homeless and 67,000 without power.

9-18- Tornado alerts issued for the East Coast. Winds and rain have left 4,000 without power on Long Island, 15,000 in Connecticut and 28,000 in Washington and Baltimore. This same weather system caused flooding in parts of Tennessee when five inches of rain fell resulting in eight water rescues.

9-19- Ocean temperatures off the North East U.S. coasts reach record highs for the first half of 2012. According to NOAA the average water temperature from North Carolina to Canada is 50.50.

A Tornado Watch is issued for most of Maryland and a foot of rain has fallen in some areas.

Arctic sea ice reaches new low levels breaking a record set three weeks ago. “We are now in unchartered territory”, said the director of the National Snow and Ice Data Center. The record low of 1.32 million square miles and nearly half the average extent from 1979 to 2010.

And wouldn’t this sight make you shit your pants?; fire torandoes in Australia have swirling winds that mix with wildfires taking flames thousands of feet into the sky.

9-20- Wind blown chunks of flaming bark forcing new evacuations in Washington wildfires. The evacuations happen as the burning bark falls on Mission Ridge, blown in by the Table Mountain Complex fires six miles away. One fire incident commander called the combination of conditions so late in September unprecedented in twenty eight years of fire fighting. 30,000 acres have burned with 4% containment.

Deadly storm kills five and injures 81 in Paraguay, South Africa.

9-21- The massive wildfire in Idaho has burned through three old mining sites containing “traces” of radioactive thorium and uranium. Environmental authorities plan to take air samples in North Folk. “This is new ground for us, but we are dealing with the issue at this time.” The risk of human exposure stems from the potential for radioactive material consumed by fire to become airborne. (Mix this with the fire tornadoes in Australia and you have Hell at your door!)

A large cargo of marble stonework that sank to the bottom of Poland’s Vistula River four centuries ago has appeared after drought and record low water levels.

9-22- First day or autumn and the high on the Land was 102 degrees with a dew point of 49 degrees. (Feel the “cool” in the breeze?)

The recent monsoon and seasonal rains have reduced the drought conditions in Arizona. 32% of the state is in severe or extreme conditions compared to 94% a month ago. But our desert lakes have not recovered. Roosevelt is down to 48% capacity from nearly full two years ago. Bartlett has shrunk to 50% down from 92% and Horseshoe Lake is dry.

On August 30th the Associated Press published a photo of a soaked, bearded man being helped by two rescuers in Slidell, Florida after he nearly drowned in flooding from Hurricane Isaac. The homeless man’s identity was not known. Because of the photo the man has been reunited with his daughters that he has not seen in 16 years.

A visitor at the Bronx Zoo in New York jumped from an elevated monorail and landed in an exhibit were he was mauled by a four hundred pound tiger. His injuries are serious.

9-23- The man mauled by a tiger at the Bronx Zoo said he wanted “to be one” with the four hundred pound animal. He claimed despite serious bites and punctures he got to “pet” the tiger. (This dude should be locked up for his own safety.)

Tropical Storm Miriam forms over the eastern Pacific 640 miles southwest of the southern tip of Baja, California.

9-24- A brush fire near San Diego destroys and damages 30 homes. The fire began yesterday in a densely populated area and has burned 2,000 acres. It is 10% contained.

A record 154 water spouts this year recorded over the Great Lakes. The old record is 94 set in 2003. The cause is a hot summer with very warm water.

Floods in India have displaced one million people and left 33 dead.

An avalanche has killed nine climbers on a Himalayan peak in Nepal with six missing.

Hurricane Miriam is a Category 3 storm.

9-25- Smoke from the San Diego fires settles over the Phoenix area.

Miriam weakens to a Category 1 hurricane.

A one half billion dollar satellite that tracks worldwide weather has failed for no apparent reason. Future forecasts may be less accurate. (?)

9-26- Tornadoes and golf ball size hail pound towns in southern Illinois. Three confirmed tornadoes.

A police officer shoots a pit bull in a Mesa, Arizona Target store. Employees had asked the dog’s owner to leave because he was sitting in the middle of an aisle with his dog for “quite some time.” When cops tried to speak to the dog’s owner he ignored them and was speaking on the phone asking his grandmother to pray with him. The dog attacked and bit an officer after an attempt to arrest the man. The man was tazed, the pooch was killed.

Ninety four thousand people in San Angelo, Texas are running out of water due to the prolonged drought. The city says it only has enough water to last one more year. On October 16th the city will enforce the highest levels of emergency measures; banning water of lawns, golf courses, gardens, close car washes and ban fresh water to be used to fill swimming pools. ( I recall in the early seventies Fountain Hills, Arizona banned the construction and filling of pools due to severe water shortages in the town. Ironic since the Verde River is only a few miles away.)

Residents in Globe, Arizona are urged to boil water for drinking due to the presence of E-Coli bacteria.

Arizona Game and Fish is on the look out for “serial” elk poachers in northern Arizona. It seems the bastard’s only goal is trophy antlers. Witnesses are urge to call “Silent Witness.”

9-29- Seven killed and hundreds evacuated after flash floods roared in Malaga, Spain.

9-30- The last “official” date heralding the end of the monsoon season in Arizona. (But due to the brilliant record keeping of your Editor in Chief the last blast was 9-11 or the day after, depending where you lived in this state.)

The ever important song of the month (and I hope you add all the songs we share with you to your vast song libraries) is Backwater Blues by the Kenny Wayne Shepherd Band.

And the quote of the month may seem dark and mysterious but it is eloquent and beautiful in its own right. “Here in the last minutes, the very end of the world, someone’s tightening a screw thinner than an eyelash, someone with slim wrists is straightening flowers…….’’
James Richardson

Until next month always remember Pioneers took bullets. Settlers took Land.
The Distinguished, Honorable, PHD MR. Blue Duck.

August 2012 Blue Duck Weather News

August 2012 Weather News! Special Anniversary Edition !

In this year of a presidential campaign, weather finally hit’s the political stage and what the president offers for drought assistance. So many raging wildfires raging in the Western mountains so late in the season when normally rain would have diminished the fire threat. A very active monsoon in southern and central Arizona.
More ominous drought news, another possible arson caused wildfire, 5.01” of rain in Anthem, Arizona in ninety minutes, later to be called the “Storm of a Century”, a silver lining to the drought, 3.8 million acres of wetlands opened up to grazing due to the drought (Edward Abbey is rolling in his grave), “Hoot-Owl restrictions”, Hottest July on record in the U.S., “Fido Bags” used to resuscitate animals, Arizona Game & Fish commissioner busted for hunting out of season, four bears trash a cabin and drink one hundred beers (pure rock star fashion), the largest python ever captured in Florida (the size and weight will amaze you!), another fallen firefighter in the West, The Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck Flooded from home, Maricopa declares a State of Emergency due to flooding, Hayduke Lives!, a surge of rattlesnake bites in Arizona, the 20th anniversary of one of the most devastating hurricanes ever to hit the U.S., George Hayduke Lives!, and finally Hurricane Isaac ends the month with flooding misery.

But what really began this exercise in misery and boredom five years ago was to study the average yearly temperature on The Land and the properties in New Mexico. The purpose was just to give us a glimpse of warming or cooling on a yearly basis. The average monthly temperature, splitting the daily highs and lows for an entire year, on The Land was 72.33 degrees this year. This is up almost three degrees from last year but the high average was 77.21 degrees in 2008.

The average temperature for the entire year at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill for this year was 51.35 degrees. The temperature has warmed every year since 2008 when the average was 48.33 degrees. Why would the temperature in the desert cool while the temperature at 7400 feet warm in this short amount of time. Three degrees may not sound like much but you have seen time and time again the effects of gradual warming.

The average temperature on The Land for this month was 91.32 “pleasant” degrees. New Mexico Land had an average of 68.36 degrees.

The rainfall for the Land in August was .99’’ bringing the yearly total to 3.77”, two thirds of the total during this monsoon. Phoenix stands at 2.77”.

It has been tropical here this month so I thought it would be noteworthy to give you the monthly humidity and dew point averages; 40% and 62.88 degrees averaged every day for the entire month. Fucking miserable.

The Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck told me that NOAA predicts a monsoon that may very well last until October with the amount of moisture and wind patterns for the deserts of Arizona. Never again, after this summer, will I make fun of the new monsoon season timeframe established a few years ago for Arizona.

Unfortunately, your Editor in Chief has no lake levels to report this month. The reporting station used the printed report for toilet paper.


8-1- Last night’s “freak storm” dumped an inch and a quarter of rain in
Anthem, Arizona in forty minutes. Some reports indicate there may have been as much as five inches of rain. Homes and walls knocked off foundations by flooding, three water rescues, two homes totally destroyed, supermarket closed due to potential roof collapse and trees downed. Red Cross on the scene and some homeowners have no flood insurance

Half of all counties in the U.S. are now labeled natural disaster areas due to the drought. With drying food crops the USDA is allowing grazing on 3.8 million acres, many wetlands. Insurance companies agree to a thirty day grace period for farmer insurance premiums. (How fucking kind of them!)

8-2- Unofficial rain total in Anthem 5.01’’ in 90 minutes two nights ago.

“Drought’s silver lining”- Fewest July tornadoes on record. With 24 in the U.S. last month that shatters the record low of 42 in July, 1960.

8-3- Mississippi River closed to barge traffic in Minnesota because the river is too low. Sixty percent of grain, twenty two percent of oil and gas, and twenty percent of coal goes down the river normally.

Tropical Storm Ernesto forms and headed for the Caribbean. It may strengthen into a hurricane.

One hundred mile stretch of the Platte River is dried up.

Typhoon Saola dumps five feet of rain on Taipei, Taiwan on an island populated by 23 million drenched souls.

House okays drought aid to help livestock producers with cost of aid.

8-4- “Storm of the Century” last week in Anthem, Arizona. Community joins residents effected by a massive cleanup today. In some homes anything not four feet above the floor of a home ruined by rain.

Flash floods in Iowa and Chicago with 80mph winds. 150,000 without power. Tornado warnings and thousands evacuated.

One hundred and twenty one structures, many of them homes, have been destroyed by fires in Oklahoma. Temperatures over one hundred degrees for the 19th straight day.
A 2600 acre grassfire near Luther may have been arson. A man was seen throwing a burning newspaper out of a black pickup truck into the grass.

Tropical Storm Florence forms off Africa and joins Ernesto in the Atlantic.

A man, presumed to have been attacked by a Great White, earlier this week is released from the hospital unable to walk. He is suffering from deep puncture wounds to both legs. He and his son were swimming toward a sand bar in the Atlantic off Ballston Beach.

8-5- Nineteen year old hiker injured from a rock fall in the Grand Canyon during a thunderstorm. His fellow hikers took him to Phantom Ranch for treatment but he had to be flown out by helicopter to Flagstaff.

Lollapalooza music festival suspended in Chicago due to extreme winds and stormy conditions. Ten of thousands were evacuated yesterday to underground garages.

Six separate fires burning in Oklahoma.

8-6- Medical examiner trying to identify body burned beyond recognition in rural, Norman, Oklahoma home after wildfires.

Fish & Game officials in parts of Montana impose “hoot owl “ restrictions on the Smith, Dearborn and Sun Rivers. Fishing isn’t allowed in the afternoons and evenings when the water temperatures are too high. Yellowstone National Park has done the same thing. Trout become distressed in warm water.

8-7- No relief for Arizona deserts with high pressure from New Mexico settled in over the state. 108 degrees with a dew point of 61 at The Land! Absolutely fucking miserable! 90 degree record low in Phoenix.

Ernesto is now a Category 1 hurricane. 1500 evacuated in Mexico’s Quintan Rue. Two cruise ships are diverted from its projected path.

Heavy rains cause 270,000 to evacuate in Manila with flooding as high as 15’.

8-8- Rare snow fall across much of South Africa.

111 degrees with a dew point of 61 degrees at The Land. Average temperature 102.5, the hottest day of the summer. New record of 116 degrees in Phoenix with a record low of 93 degrees. Bull Head City 119 degrees.

25 year old hiker rescued at top of Camelback Mountain after getting lost and running out of water. Dehydration resulted in being airlifted off the mountain.

July was the hottest month on record for the “contiguious” U.S. Drought now covers 63% of the lower 48 states. Average temperature 77.6 degree. 3.3 degrees above the 20th century average.

Two million rescued as Typhoon Haikui hits China.

8-9- Record low high of 93 degrees and a record high of 114 in Phoenix.

Massive cleanup in the Philippines today after monsoon floods kill ninety one and 300,000 folks remain in shelters.

Arizona Game & Fish Commissioner busted for shooting a prairie dog out of season. He said on April 9th he was hunting rabbits with a son of a family friend. With no rabbits found apparently the kid popped a dog. The animals cannot be hunted after April 1st. The kind Commissioner reported himself and will not lose his job, be severely punished or lose his hunting license. He has been accredited for turning himself in as the responsible thing to do. (Get a rope!)

“Fido Bags” created by Glendale fire officials are used to resuscitate dogs and other muzzle animals injured in fires. They are specialized oxygen masks. The bags have now been introduced to other cities by the Fetch Foundation.

A black bear went in and out of a Colorado candy store multiple times to steal and eat chocolate. Surveillance video showed the bear prying open the door and grabbing some candy near the register. He took the candy outside to eat and made seven trips in fifteen minutes. The only evidence he left behind was some dirt on a counter and paper on the ground. “He was very clean and careful. He ate a lot of candy” the store owner said.

8-10- A Micro Burst reported at Oregon Pipe National Park in Arizona. A roof was ripped off an auditorium and garbage cans strewn about like empty beer cans.

Severe weather delays across the East Coast’s busiest airports. A tornado reported in Long Island, New York.

According to the USDA this will be the worst nation wide corn production due to drought in seventeen years. Corn prices are at record highs and this drought is proclaimed by some as te worst since 1956.

Death toll rises to six from bad ass Ernesto in Mexico. Three were killed when a tree fell on their pickup.

Two wildfires are coming close to an ammunition factory in Bosnia. The efforts to extinguish one are hampered by a minefield. (Shit, and we think we have it rough out here in the West with fires.)

8-11- At two p.m this afternoon TwinkieDuck emailed with a weather report from Happy Jack; 59 degrees and pouring rain.

Folks hit hard by the damaging rain in Anthem, Arizona on July 31st are informed by their insurance company they have no flood insurance. One owner sustained 60,000 dollars in damage to her home in the “Master Planned” community of Anthem Parkside.

The Tonto National Forest reduces camping restrictions in the area of three June bear attacks on people.

And this in from the Lovely Mrs. Blueduck: A mother bear and her three cubs broke into a Norwegian cabin drinking one hundred beers, eating all the food and knocking over a wall. “They had a hell of a party in there.” the owner said. “The entire cabin was destroyed.” With paw prints and shit everywhere there is little doubt the bears were responsible. “Your average criminals don’t typically break down a wall when a front door will work just fine.”

A young male mountain lion in Oregon has been trapped and killed for killing two domestic sheep. Wildlife biologists say the animal had a fractured right leg and signs of an earlier gunshot wound. Both injuries impaired the animal’s ability to hunt and likely caused it to kill easy prey.

8-12- Forty homes in Fresno, California evacuated due to a wildfire.

“Drought’s Wrath felt across U.S…… Farmers go town to town to buy water. Nurseries hold “heat stroke” sales. Tap water emerges at 84 degrees.” (Try living in the desert with a well and your holding tank is black. No need to use hot water all summer. “Go Green.”)

80-100 mph winds in parts of Connecticut are confirmed as micro bursts and not a tornado.

8-13- Record high of 115 in Phoenix. Seventh straight day of morning low temperatures not below 90 degrees.

A new fire in the Tonto National Forest blankets the Valley of the Sun with smoke and haze on top of this miserable heat.

The President announces that the Department of Agriculture intends to buy 170 million pounds of pork, lamb, chicken and catfish to “help farmers” suffering from the drought. The food purchases will go toward “food nutrition assistance.” One official said “This is a win-win. Farmers and ranchers will have an opportunity to sell more of their products at this critical time and tax payers will get a better price on food that wouul have to be purchased later.” (There are several ways to interpret this; more control over the masses, trying to really prepare for what may be the worst of this drought or just plain politicking before an election. To me the whole thing “smells funny.” Wonder why there is no mention of beef? I suppose it does not fit into dietary guidelines for this health conscious administration?)

8-14- There are 62 wildfires burning in eight western states.

A 20 year old firefighter is killed by a falling tree near Irofino, Idaho while working a fire there. The rest of her crew made it to a safety zone and were pulled away from the fire. 653 square miles have burned and five ranches evacuated.

The Taylor Bridge Fire in Central Washington has grown from 2800 acres to 20,000 acres in hours. 70 homes destroyed and 450 homes evacuated.

3700 farmers and ranchers in Missouri have been approved for emergency well drilling by the state’s government. 95% the Show Me state is parched.

693 West Nile Virus cases in Texas considered an epidemic. Night time spraying will occur for the first time since the 1960’s.

Firefighters rescue a 17 year old girl three quarters up Camelback Mountain in Phoenix. She was so dehydrated she was passing out.


8-15-The Mistake Peak Fire has grown to 3500 acres near Pumpkin Center in the Tonto National Forest in Arizona and is 10% contained.

Booming, rolling thunder at midnight above The Land. High winds and not much rain but the power was out for seven hours. It was a hot night and a bucket bath morning.

Prison inmates help fire crews fight the massive fire in Washington. The Taylor Bridge Fire has grown to 28,000 acres and destroyed 70 homes.

The Trinity Ridge Fire in Idaho has grown to 63,000 acres.

The lower Mississippi River has dropped another five feet and halted essential barge traffic once again.

8-16- An inch and a half of rain and hail falls in Flagstaff, Arizona in 45 minutes.

Two heat related deaths in Yuma County, Arizona. One was a “transient” found dead in a field. The other was an 80 year old woman found in her 105 degree apartment with the air conditioner off.

A jury in San Bernandino has found a man guilty five counts of murder after five folks sustained heart attacks durning a massive wildfire. The man has been convicted of starting the 91,000 acre fire that that destroyed 100 homes in 1993 in the foothills above San Bernandino.

8-17- A Flash Flood Warning issued for the town of Maricopa, Arizona form noon to three p.m. They were right. Although I only had a few sprinkles on the way home, heavy rain in the hills around us sent torrents of flash flooding down into the desert and the roads around our home. I could not drive home the normal way and had to drive fifteen miles east and south to come home on higher ground.

Three inches of rain fell last night in Surprise, Arizona. There were 8 high water rescues on paved roads! Flooded homes and 1500 without power.

Fifty two out of control fires burning in the West.

Tropical Storm Helene forms in the Gulf of Mexico. Flood Warnings are issued for the coast.

8-18-The mop up begins in Surprise, Arizona after three inches of rain fell in a short period of time and flooded homes and streets.

Heat wave with 104 degree temperatures in France. The government is determined to prevent what happened in the summer of 2003 when 15,000 people died during a heat wave.

Tropical Storm Helene strikes land off the Gulf of Mexico.

Hurricane Gordon headed for Azores.

8-19- The Mistake Peak Fire in the Tonto National Forest in Arizona has burned 5,260 acres and is 65% contained.

Hurricane Gordon is now a Category 2 storm.

8-20- The first two weeks in Phoenix are the hottest on record. Average temperature 111.2 degrees. Average lows were 88.8 degrees. This is the first time in history the daily average temperature was over 100 degrees for two weeks.

Maricopa County, Arizona has stopped investigating how a rainstorm severly flooded parts of the Anthem community last month. They are saying is was a one in one thousand year catastrophe. “No one was at fault because it was an act of God.”

Eight on a sailboat on Lake Superior injured by a lightning strike. One boy later died of his injuries.

8-21- Poor Mrs. Blue Duck could not get home due to flash flooding on The Land until two thirty in the morning. Thank God she was not stranded by high water and was able to get back to Maricopa to wait it out. What a long night it was for both of us. Me worried and not getting much sleep. Her worried about not being able to get home until morning.

There was heavy flooding in east Mesa last night. Two homes damaged, trees down and one thousand without power.

A Glendale, Arizona neighborhood on lockdown after bees attack. A four year old saved the life of his grandmother by pushing a panic button the woman wore. The woman was stung many times and the four year old covered her with a blanket. ( A remarkable child!)

Tropical Storm Issac formed in the Atlantic yesterday. It may grow into a hurricane and threaten next week’s Republican National convention.

8-22- A State of Emergency is declared by the governor of the Town of Maricopa after 1.97 inches of rain has fallen in two days. Localized heavy flooding this afternoon. Sandbags are being passed out and firefighters are going door to door in flooded neighborhoods. Maricopa Meadow’s golf course is under fifteen feet of water. (Let me guess. This golf course must be in the normally dry Santa Rosa wash?)

After E-Coli bacteria is found in the water supply, San Tan, Arizona residents are urged to boil water before drinking it. Folks are outraged!

The West Nile virus this year is the largest in U.S. history. With 1100 cases reported and 41 dead it has doubled in the past week. Twenty eight of the dead are in Texas. Every state has reported cases. “Never this far and this fast.”

Wildfires have burned nearly seven million acres in the United States destroying more land in the first eight months of any year since accurate record keeping began in the early sixties. Twelve firefighters have died this season and Colorado hit especially hard.

A State of Emergency is declared in Bosnia as a heat wave fuels wildfires and leaves people suffering from heat exhaustion.

A crocodile attacks a homeless man near a lagoon in Cancun and bites off his hand. (If it wasn’t enough misery to be homeless.)

8-23- .80’’ of rain today in Phoenix a new record for this date. A brief shelf cloud was photographed over Tempe last night, a very rare event for this region. Mudslides on I-10 and 75th Avenue from a retention area leaves a huge sinkhole and three lanes of east bound traffic closed. A seventy five year old man in a wheelchair and his driver are rescued from a flooded Indian Bend Wash in Scottsdale. Apparently the medical transport driver ignored barricades and drove into the wash.

“Drought makes green marijuana crops more visible for police in Indiana.” Cornfields across the state are dry and brown and pot crops “stand out like a sore thumb”. Trained troopers fly over the land to look for the green crop. (Give me a fucking break! A family has to make a living doing something if the corn won’t grow.)

Tropical Storm Issac threatens Haiti and the Dominican Republic.

A Queen Creek, Arizona man is in critical condition after he was found covered with bees after mowing his yard.

8-24- The driver of a medical transport van that drove through roadblocks into the flooded Indian Bend Wash yesterday will face criminal charges for endangerment.

The Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck sent me photos and a story of two people very lucky to be alive. They were driving through Oak Creek Canyon when a huge boulder fell through their windshield. The photo of the boulder in the passenger seat had enough weight and size to take off the head of one of the occupants.

This is the 20th anniversary of Hurricane Andrew in Florida. It was a Category 5 storm with 212 mph winds. 126,000 homes were destroyed or damaged and twenty six dead.

Tropical Storm Issac is building strength as it bears down on Haiti. A Tropical Storm Watch is issued for the Florida Keys.

8-25- One inch of rain fell in a brief amount of time in Flagstaff today.

This spooky contribution is from DarDuck: A recent surge of rattlesnake bites have occurred in Arizona. Fourteen bites are reported in Tucson in a six day period. Young rattlers are just as lethal as adults if not more so. They are born with fangs and extremely potent venom to help them hunt while they are small. They are harder to see and don’t rattle as loudly as an adult rattlesnake. The average cost of a snakebite is twenty five thusand dollars for the anti venom alone. August and September are the most active months due to breeding, and recently, the surge in moisture and flooding.

Tropical Storm Issac is on the northern coastline of eastern Cuba after claiming three lives in Haiti. Waves in Cuba are as high as twenty feet and flights are cancelled. The water temperature is 87 degrees which helps produce a hurricane.

Several thousand villages evacuated in Serbia as wildfires burn out of control. Heat wave, drought and dried up corn fueling the fires.

Green Peace activists storm a Russian oil rig to protest drilling in the Arctic. They were first offered hot soup and then blasted with cold water and pieces of metal by crew members. The brave fuckers managed to erect climbing tents on the vessel before being “evacuated.” Before leaving they managed to leave a banner on the rig saying “Don’t kill the Arctic.”

8-26- The GOP delays convention for one day due to Issac as high winds and rain hit Florida ahead of the storm. Gulf oil platforms evacuated. A Hurricane Warning is issued for New Orleans.

85,000 folks have fled monsoon flooding in Myanmar. 600,000 acres of rice fields are under water.

And this grizzly (in more ways than one) from the Lovely Mrs. Blue Duck: A hiker in Alaska’s Denali National Park was photographing a grizzly bear for at least eight minutes before the bear mauled and killed the man. The hiker was alone along the Toklat River two days ago when he came within 50 yards of the bear. Parts of his bloody backpack and clothing were found later by other hikers. The bear was found guarding his “cashe” of food later. The bear was destroyed.
Park rules require a quarter mile separation between people and animals and actually conduct a training class for hikere prepared to set forth in Denali. Because of strict rules this is the first known fatal mauling in one hundred years.

8-27- Residents in unprotected low lying areas outside of New Orleans evacuated as Issac grows closer to hurricane status. It is on the same storm track as the monster Katrina seven years ago to the day.

8-28- Now Hurricane Issac makes landfall in south east Louisiana. One inch of rain per hour falling and one hundred thousand without power.
Orange Beach, Alabama has twelve to fifteen foot waves.

8-29- Issac is only a Category 1 hurricane but moving very slowly and dumping massive amounts of rain. Storm surges passes eight foot levees and second floor house rescues are taking place. One foot of rain so far in and near New Orleans and 500,000 without power.

Yosemite officials have notified 1700 past visitors they may have been exposed to a rodent borne disease blamed for two deaths of people who stayed in cabins at the national park. Four others have contacted the hantivirus disease.

8-30- With fifteen billion dollars in levee improvements since Katrina New Orleans escapes worst of storm but rural areas are inundated with flooding. Some feel the ‘’improvements” simply diverted the water to lower elevations. Slidell, Louisiana has areas that have never flooded with up to five feet of water. 50,000 ordered to evacuate immediately in Tangipahoa Parish as heavy rains threaten to cause a dam to fail across the Mississippi State line. Up to sixteen inches or rain has fallen and 850,000 across Louisiana and Mississippi are without power.

8-31- Up to twenty inches of rain from Issac has fallen with damage to Arkansas and Mississippi. Five deaths attributed to the storm. Half million people are without power in oppressive heat and humidity.

Four thousand evacuated from Ojen, in southern Spain from a wildfire out of control.

A black bear was having fun in Sierra Vista, Arizona jumping into residents’ yards. Police herded the bear into open desert and mountains so he could terrorize someone or something else.

And there you have it my fine readers around the world! Your fine staff at Blue Duck Weather tried especially hard to make this anniversary issue the longest and most tiresome reading ever!

Before we leave you a new feature this edition is the fact of the month. More people each year are killed by storm surges than high wind.

The quote of the month is from a citizen in Louisiana during this recent hurricane. “Mother Nature is a tricky dame. Don’t care what you do. If she wants to get you she will come and get you.” Amen, Brother.

Appropriately the song of the month is “Weatherbeaten Soul” by Reckless Kelly.

Until next month remember Settlers took land. Pioneers took bullets.

The Distinguished, Honorable, Master of Bullshit, Professor MR Blue Duck.