Blue Duck Weather November 2009

November 2009 Weather News!

This last month seemed to be a quiet if not boring month for weather in the United States. But then it occurred to me that your fine staff at BlueDuck Weather report a great deal of human tragedy and loss with the ferocity of Mother Nature at her finest and worst. We report death and casualties as mere numbers and nothing more. However it is our solemn duty to report the facts as they are, numbers. We will offer no bias or opinion in our award winning journalism. My millions of fine readers deserve nothing less. Hurricane Ida and a nasty typhoon did some terrible damage in other countries as you will read as the weather days unfold.

I think you will also find some interesting statistics and facts in this weather report. For example, do you know what is the largest fresh, unfrozen water lake in the world? You will also read a ten year study about the number of record highs vs. the amount of record lows in the United States. You can be on either side of the global warming controversy but these numbers send a chilling message. But the question remains, and I agree, what is humankinds contribution to warming? If you look at it from the amount of trash and pollution that is produced the answer is obvious. We are pigs! I think the earth would be a better place without the likes of “mankind” and it would be a duck’s paradise!.

November was a delightful month for moderate temperatures and it continues to cool. The Land was ten degrees cooler at the end of the month than at the beginning. It was 13.50 degrees cooler at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill in New Mexico. You will read later that there were some extremely cold mornings there. With bone dry conditions the temperature plummets after sundown.

The average temperature at The Land was 62.50 degrees. At 7400’ in New Mexico it was 40.38 degrees.

The average humidity at the Land was 33% and the dew point was 31 degrees; very close to each other but not bone dry.

There was very little wind in November and it seems like the last seven months have recorded higher than average wind speeds but I think this is the lowest wind speed average I have recorded; 1.25 mph. (If we were relying on wind energy we would be fucking dead!.)

The Land received a paltry .13” of rain for the month bringing the total to 4.23 inches for the year. It better get busy or this will be another year of drought conditions for the desert. I believe Phoenix is just under three inches of rain for the year.

The biggest lakes in the South West are showing the effects of little rain. Mead is 40% full, Pleasant is down to 54%. Powell is still trying to rise at 62% and our beloved Roosevelt is at 71%. Both Powell and Pleasant were near one hundred percent capacity at the beginning of this year.

In this fine weather journal you will read about more record heat for Phoenix (In November?), A new ocean forming in the desert ?, what state has the highest amount of carbon dioxide pollution, a country desperate for rain, weather and your holiday pumpkin pies, where the most rain fell in one day on a town and broke an all time record and a man cleared of murder charges because evidence showed a wild animal killed the man’s wife. Let’s now let the fun begin.

11-1- The fourth typhoon in the Philippines kills twenty and blasts its way toward Vietnam.

11-2- Ten degrees above normal in Phoenix and twenty five degrees above temperatures of just last week.

A new super strain of rabies is affecting the Brown bat only found in Coconino County, Arizona. Rabies can be transferred to skunks without physical contact. (scary shit!)

11-3- 96 degree record high in Phoenix.

There are more wildfires in southern California east of Los Angeles. The fires may have been set deliberately.

Unusual fall flooding occurring in Missouri and Illinois. Thousands of acres of farm land underwater.

The “evil” twister Mirinae has hit central Vietnam killing twenty three people.

11-4- Work begins on a one billion dollar New Orleans flood barrier.

The death toll is up to fifty seven people in Vietnam from Mirinae. Villages are cut off by rising flood waters and people are stranded on roof tops.

A thirty five mile crack in the Ethiopian desert may be the beginning of a new ocean. The crack was first discovered five years ago but it is growing.

In Dudley, Massachusetts it is illegal to own more than three cats without a special kennel license. (If RyDuck had his way there would be no cat ownership at all.)

11-5- The death toll from Mirinae in Vietnam rises to ninety one people and fifteen thousand evacuated.

Hurricane Ida develops and Nicaragua and Honduras may receive flash floods and mudslides.

11-6- Ida slams Nicaragua and then weakens to a tropical storm. 80% of the homes in Tasbapauni are destroyed.

Flooding after days of rain have forced forty four thousand people to evacuate from their homes in Mexico. Rivers jumped their banks flooding homes in ninety communities. A State of Emergency has been called by the federal government.

11-7- Ida heads toward the United States and could impact the Gulf Coast in three days.

Tens of thousands of homes flooded in Mexico’s Gulf Coast. Many of the two hundred thousand people impacted refused to leave because of the fear of looting.

11-8-- A State of Emergency has been declared in Louisiana as Hurricane Ida approaches. It is a Category 2 storm with 100mph winds.

Ninety one people are dead in Valenzuela from Ida.

11-9- Ida downgraded to a Tropical Storm but may hit Florida with 75mph winds. Heavy rain, five to ten inches, predicted all the way up into Georgia.

A rare tornado rakes Oregon’s coast.

Rescuers dig for dozens of people buried in landslides in El Salvador. Days of heavy rain linked to Hurricane Ida caused mud and boulders to crash down the side of a volcano burying homes and cars in the town of Verapaz. Some houses were split in two by boulders.

11-10- A 91 degree record was set in Phoenix today breaking the record of 90 degrees set in 1989.

Yours truly killed the egg sucking bull snake today.

11-11- Ida weakens but soaks the Gulf Coast.

Mudslides from heavy rains kill 42 in India.

Ten thousand Salvador flood victims need food and thirteen thousand are homeless. The death toll is sixty.

A father and seven kids survive after being buried in snow in Oregon during a camping trip. When leaving camp they made it a mile before being stranded in their car in three feet of snow. They were rescued after two nights.

Twelve inches of rain possible in the Virginias from Ida.

11-12- Parts of Australia enduring a five day record heat wave.

Heavy rain and lightning knock out power to sixty million people in Brazil. (Editor’s note: Sixty million people? This must be a dense population in a very small area or the electric grid delivery system ain’t worth shit.)

11-13- Carbon dioxide pollution in Arizona has grown 61% in twenty years. This is more than any other state and three times more than the national average. (And you wonder why the EPA is breathing down our throats with fines?)

Snow falling in Flagstaff and the snow level is expected to drop to six thousand feet.

Remnants of Ida flood the Eastern Seaboard. The Virginia governor has declared a State of Emergency and five are killed.

From January 1st, 200 to September 30th, 2009 the continental United States has experienced 291,237 record high temperatures and 142,420 record lows.

11-14- A fierce rainstorm sends mud, water and large rocks flowing from slopes ravaged by fires in a Los Angeles neighborhood.

Unusually heavy snow storms in China kill forty and has destroyed five hundred thousand acres of winter crops. Snow may have been caused by cloud seeding and nine thousand buildings have collapsed. (Be careful messing with Nature! You may get what you hoped for and then some.)

Twisters with 100mph winds pound Britain. Sixty homes are damaged.

11-15- A foot of snow fell around Denver, Colorado.

Vietnam climber Tomaz Humar was found dead in the Himalayas yesterday. He was injured and stranded on a 23,710’ peak. He was a veteran mountain climber.

11-17- Plans to raise the water level behind China’s massive Three Gorges dam this month have stalled because of the worsening drought and landslide risks. Once the water reaches 574’ deep the dam would begin generating electricity. The water reached 561’ and stopped. The lake behind the dam is four hundred and ten miles long and has displaced 1.4 million people.

Phoenix is 4.21 inches below normal rainfall to date.

11-18- A massive landslide in northern China has partially buried a village and killed twenty three people.

Parched Venezuela asks Cuba to help “zap” clouds so that it rains. Cloud seeing has no basis in science but some insist it works.

11-19- The low at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill is a ooshy 12 degrees.

As the world’s largest lake, Superior, warms it is creating stronger winds. This lake holds ten percent of the unfrozen fresh water on the planet.

11-20- Heavy rains recently in Oregon have hurt the pumpkin harvest. There may be a shortage of pumpkin pies as the largest pie maker is based out of Oregon.

Floods cause havoc in the U.K. and Ireland. Two hundred have to be rescued and two bridges collapse.

Yellowstone Grizzlies are kept on the Endangered Species list by a U.S. District Judge. The U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has argued that the bears have recovered from near extermination and no longer need protected.

11-21- Winds and dust interrupt travel around Reno, Nevada. One person is killed in an eight car pileup on I-80. Winds exceeded 80mph and a foot of snow fell in the northern mountains.

Warmer than average temperatures are forecasted for the northern and western United States in December.

Britain receives record rain and “Biblical” flooding. Some flooding is eight feet deep. Cockermouth was the hardest hit town with one thousand homes flooded. 12.3 inches of rain fell in twenty four hours, the most rainfall in twenty four hours ever recorded in the U.K.

11-22- A man was arrested at Los Angeles International Airport for trying to smuggle lizards onto a flight. Fifteen live lizards were stuffed into his money belt and strapped to his chest.
DUMB ASS...i bet he liked the way it felt (Mrs. DUCK)

11-23- Seven degree low at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill.

A ten year study has found 17, 650 species of living creatures below the 656’ depth in the ocean, the depth where there is no sunlight penetration. 5,722 live in extreme depths over three thousand feet. The deep sea used to be considered a “desert” with no life.

Two Tucson men have been convicted of stealing saguaros from Tucson National Park. One man received eight months in federal prison and the other received six months of home confinement and one thousand hours of community service.

11-24- Health Watch issued in Phoenix for particulate pollution.

A wind driven wildfire breaks out south of Los Angeles. State Route 241 is acting as a fire break protecting homes. The fire is ten percent contained at sixty acres.

Every second around the world sixty three lightning strikes occur. Since 2002 the World Wide Lightning Location Network ( that’s a mouthful) has been working on listening to the earth’s electrical charges from the sky. It may help scientists to predict hurricane strength.

English flood victims return home. Eighteen hundred bridges are being inspected for structural damage from flooding.

A crowded ferry sinks in Indonesia during a storm. Twenty nine people have died, twenty missing and two hundred and fifty five survivors rescued.

Hundreds of icebergs that split from Antarctic ice shelves are drifting toward New Zealand. Some are visible from the coastline, the first time since 1931. Navigation Warnings have been issued for the area.

In Raleigh, North Carolina airport officials have noticed a marked increase in the number of coyotes crossing the paths of taxiing planes. The animals cause delays in take offs and landings. ( Run them over and get on with it!)

11-29- A Winter Storm Advisory issued for Safford (the day the DudeDuck and I break camp, thankfully as it turned out.)

Two people were killed in separate crashes on I-10 near Casa Grande yesterday due to blowing dust. Heavy dust storms triggered five different collisions on I-10.

3.5’’ of snow in Flagstaff.

Park Rangers removed the body of a man two hundred feet below the South Rim of the Grand Canyon.

The death toll from floods in Saudi Arabia reaches one hundred and six. Many homes were built on normally dry river beds. (It doesn’t take an engineer to figure out you don’t build where water has flowed)

A Swedish husband has been cleared of the death of his wife, the culprit was a moose. The woman was found dead after taking an evening stroll last year. Although the husband was initially jailed as a suspect moose hair and saliva was found on the victim’s clothing.
(Joan, I think this is a set up, how about you? MRs. Duck)

11-30- The 2009 Atlantic hurricane season officially ends tomorrow. Only two storms made landfall in the U.S. It was the quietest season in three years.

The quote of the month from the Mighty BroadDuck reads as follows; “It’s getting to be that time of year that you can hear the winter winds howling, either that or the Missus just sat on a cold toilet seat. "(Jesus Sean, what the hell?) Mrs. DUCK

And deep in seclusion of Colorado RyDuck sends this for our nature weather observation; “Red sky at night, sailors delight. Red sky at morning sailor’s take warning. A red morning sky means likely rain in that day. A red evening sky suggests the next day will be clear.” (The DudeDuck and I witnessed this first hand last Saturday morning on Mount Graham. The morning sky was red and all hell broke loose that night and the next day.)

The little know Arizona fact from the beautiful and soft spoken TwinkyDuck’s is as follows. “Many people think of Arizona as desert and home to cow ducks but this state has the largest Ponderosa pine forest. The highest elevation in the state is 12,633’ above sea level with Humphrey’s Peak north of Flagstaff. The Colorado River in the bottom of the Grand Canyon is the lowest level at 70’ above sea level.

The song of the month is actually a line from a song by Bob Dylan of which name escapes my feeble brain entirely. “You don’t need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.”

Until next month when the hot burning tree branch is stuck up your asshole, remember Pioneers took bullets, Settlers took land.
(What the hell do I say????????????) Mrs. Duck

The honorable, distinguished, award winning Professor MR BlueDuck.

October 2009 Blue Duck Weather

Halleluhah! The Julbilee begins and the angels sing. The golden trumpet honks (like a goose) and paradise is upon us again.

The"squirrels do the happy dance of joy" (this is one of my favorite lines from the lovely Mrs. Blueduck. ALthough we don't have any fucking squirrels in this blister ass desert it sounds quite nice).

The quail no longer have to droop their pretty little heads under the pencil line shade of a creosote toescape the heat. The doves don't sound so mournful, the fucking rattlesnakes are getting lazy and spending more time in the ground dreaming about their next bite and feast.

The poor homeless drunk can now sleep it off under a shade tree without dying of dehydration from the heat coupled with the dehydration of being hung over.

What I am trying to say is it finally COOLED DOWN! The temperature was a full eleven degrees cooler at the end of the month than at the beginning. Yes, we had a couple of record breakers past one hundred but they were short lived, just to remind us not to become too soft and smiley faced.

In this latest installment you read some astonishing facts and information including, but not limited to, the continuing fires in California, the wild west still exists outside the city limits of Maricopa, Arizona, a woman beats a fawn to death, too early for Christmas, storm devastation and the world economy, twin fire analyses by yours truly (there wasn't something quite right about the reporting of that fire and I suspect a cover up to save the ass and face of the United States Forest Service, a twisted Halloween prank?, the backlash of stray cats in Phoenix, the Atlantic hurricane season has been mild and why, Indian summer my ass!, more wildlife sightings from the "astute" citizens from Maricopa and idiot planning from these same people, a storm with a mind of its own, a cat killer in the East Valley, a Mount Graham red squirrel update, who is being blamed for the drought and where, weater reports from Ryduck from his secluded location in Colorado and more amazing rare weater facts from the beautiful Twinky Duck.

Antelope Hill and Talking Trees experienced only an average four degree cool down from the beginning of the month to the end, but they had mornings in the teens and one day the average temperature for the entire day was 25 degrees. Their average temperature for the month was 47.98 degrees.

The average temperature at the land for the month was 70.04 degrees.

The average humidity was 27.83%. The average dew point was 32.51 degrees.

The average wind speed was 5.24 mph. Yes, there were even some wind chills but they are too boring to report and the math is confusing.

There wasn't any rain at all for the month of October.

Lake Mead is 40% empty, Pleasant is at a disturbing 51% and if you read last month's report ten percent of its volume is probably trash. Powell stands at 63% and our mighty Roosevelt at 77%. (We better get some fucking rain!)

10-1 It was twenty degrees cooler this morning in Phoenix than yesterday' twenty degrees in Flagstaff.

Phoenix ozone alerts declining since April for 2009. The cause is attributed to lower June temperatures and fewer cars on the road due to the recession.

Typhoon Parm gathers strength and will probably hit the already battered and saturated Philippines in the next two days.

10-2 "Super Typhoon" is bearing down on the Philippines. Mass evacuations are ordered.

Severe flooding in the Sicilian city of Messina kills twenty, washing away cars and collapsing buildings. NINE INCHES OF RAIN FELL IN THREE HOURS!

Tropical Storm Olaf forms off Mexico's coast, the fifteenth names storm of 2009.

Too early for Christmas? A young mule deer buck in Montana has been spotted with a string of Christmas lights hanging from his antlers and body. (The lucky hunter who gets this deer can hang him up, plug the lights into a generator and skin himk in the twinkly glow of the lights. It puts me in the Christmas spirit just thinking about it.)

10-3 A controlled burn near Williams, AZ, is out of control due to unpredicted shifting winds. The blaze has burned a thousand acres and the Red Cross has set up shelters for evacuees. Sixty four homes have been evacuated. High winds ground air tankers and wind speeds are predicted at 26mph for tomorrow.

Typhoon Parma pounds the Philippines with heavy rain and 108 mph winds.

The death toll from mud slides in Sicily could reacy fifty people.

A woman in Ohio is sentenced to eighty hours of community service after beating a fawn to death with a shovel. The woman became "frightened" when she found the baby deer in her garden. (She should be beat with a shovel!....Mrs. Blue duck agrees...dumb ass lady!)

10-4 Twin Fire still burning with zero containment and winds of 70 mph. The fire is still at one thousand acres.

The Sheep Fire in the San Gabriel mountains of California has burned 5.5 square miles and is only at 10% containment. Six thousand people are ordered to evacuate.

Two great white sharks seen near Santa Cruz, CA. One man was fishing from a pier and a ten foot shark grabbed his bait. The shark pulled the man down the length of the pier before shreading the bait and letting go. (mrs. blueduck would have let go of the pole and run screaming...all the time hearing the jaws music in her head)

10-5 Ten degrees below normal and a light snow is falling on the San Francisco Peaks near Flagstaff.

Reports say the Twin fire bieng held at one thousand acres but Williams schools were closed today. Fifteen percent containment reported and fire still held at one thougsand acres?

The Sheep Fire in the San Gabriel Mojntains in CA has burned 7500 acres and is 20% contained.

Two feet of snow falls in Idaho and Montana and a total surprise this early in the season.

Flooding in India kills 220 people and 2.5 million are homeless. It is the worst flooding in 100 years.

A woman in Pennsylvania is killed by a "pet" black bear while she was cleaning its cage. (Joan...remember this..bears are not pets)

10-6 Williams schools repopen and the Twin Fire still held at 1000 acres and 20% contained. (I just don't understand how an out of control fire that is fueled by high winds closes schools, and brings the Red Cross, can not burn more than 1000 acres in four days. How can a fire keep burning without consuming more fuel and land as it burns? There is a fox in the henhouse in my humble opinion; a mass coverup by some mighty embarrassed people!

Typhoon Melor is a Category 4 storm and may hit Japan in two days.

10-7 The Twin Fire is 60% contained.

Typhoon Melor is a category 4 storm and may hit Japan in 2 days.

The "quaint" little city of Maricopa is not on the weather map of some local news channels and some residents are complaining. The weather reporting equipment was on the old highschool which was demolished. (Yes sir, fucking progress with NO planning!)

According to the Maricopa Monitor reports from Hidden Valley (where we live" a neighbor shot a dog" and "a theft of horses was reported." At least we are called Hidden Valley and not Crow Town (which is on the Gila Res.)

Southern California warned of possible mudslides when it rains this winter due to all the scorched land from fires. The fire in the San Gabriel mountains is 32% contained and burned 11 square miles. Thousands of evacuees are allowed to return home.

Tropical storm Henry is gathering strength in the Atlantic.

Aid is slow to arrive for 5,000,000 victims of India's recent flooding. Millions of acres are under water. 35% of India's corn output may be destroyed.

The U.N asks for $74,o00,000 in world aid to help flood victims in the Philippines after the last two major storms.

10-8 The Twin fire is 90% controlled at 908 acres (?)

Henry weakens to a Tropical Depression in the Atlantic.

Typhoon Melar hits Japan with 123 mph winds, knocking out power to hundreds of thousands and killing 2 people.

10-9 Mudlsides from recent storms bury 150 people in the Philippines. the death toll is up to 450.

In Iowa, someone dressed a dead deer in a clown suit with a wig and put it on the family's porch. Officers think it was a Halloween prank bu the were not amused. They have begun an ivestigation.

10-10 RyDuck reports hard ice and 21 degrees at 11 A.M. He was going to the grocery store in his flip flops. (Hell, I would have on under-rues, thermal socks and 1000mg Gore-Tex boots.)

A week of rain brings some relief to dought stricken south Texas. The dought continues 34% of the state. Three months ago it was 68%.

A tornado rips through Kentucky and causes major damage.

The death toll in the Philippines from Parma ten days ago is up to 600 people. Thousands of people are still on roof tops waiting for rescue. Water was released from one large dam to keep it from collapsing and one other dam has already collapsed.

A man lost his arm below the elbow golfing in Hilton Head, South Carolina. The victim was bending down to pick up a ball when a 10 foot alligator attacked him. The alligator was killed at the scene and a necropsy was performed to remove the man's arm. The arm was stored in a cooler in the hopes of reattaching it to the vicitm.

10-12 Average last day of one hundered degree weather in Phoenix is September 28th. It may hit one hundred in several days.

Early ice and snow causes sixty car pile up in Colorado. Much of the mid-west receives snow.

Tropical Storm Patricia strengthens and a watch advisory issued for the Southern Baja California peninsula.

10-13 Considerable moisture left over from Typhoon Melor may hit southern CA this week. 4 to 65 inches of rain are predicted and fire raveged communities are preparing for potentially massive mudslides. Evacuations are being ordered for the Santa Barbara mountains. 50 mph winds and rain already in Central CA.

The nation wide death toll from mudslides in the Philippines is so hight, extra coffins are being shipped in from other parts of the world.

20 cats found dead in a Phoenix canal. Police believe they were intentionally thrown in. Necropsies will be performed to see if the cats drowned or were already dead when thown into the water. None of the cats had tags or collars.

10-14 Tropical storm Patrick weakens as it approaches San Cabos, Mexico.

An Ohio boy casing a football was attacked by a deer that was ready to engage in a fight with another buck. The buck flipped the boy with its antlers. His nine year old friend beat the deer with a stick until it left.

A great horned owl in Indiana flew into a moving truck and survived. The grill was badly damaged and the truck that to be towed but eh owl was conscious and sent to a wildlife rehabilitation facility. (This is bad medicine for the driver if you are a Native American in AZ)

10-15 Snow in Connecticut more like Decmeber weather.

Tropical storm Patrick dies out. The peak of the Atlantic hurrican season passes quietly and has been the least active in 10 years. El Nino, the Pacific warm water phenomenon, played a big roll in supressing Atlantic hurricanes this year.

10-16 Local heroes in Phoenix sending aid to Mexico from Hurricane Jimena that hit last month.

The first 2 weeks of October have been the coldest in Minneapolis history.

State College, PA, received 1 1/2" of snow, the earliest date snow has ever been recorded.

The Federal Climate Prediction Center forecasts a warmer north and cooler south for December through February. El Nino to strengthen and influence conditions.

10-17 A 102 degree record in Phoenix, 99 degree record in Tucson, and 86 degree record in Prescott.

Hurricane Rick is a category 4 storm off Mexico's Pacific coast and is considered extremely dangerous. It has sustained winds of 135 mph and warm waters cause it to jump from category 1 to a 4 in only 36 hours.

Evacuations ordered as yet another typhoon, Lupit, is expected to hit the Philippines. Lupit is the Philipino word for "cruel." It has wind up to 106 mph. The last two typhoons have killed 773 people and affected 7 million.

10-18 Hurrican Rick is a category 5 storm and could hit Baja resorts by 10-21. Winds peaked at 180 mph and is the strongest storm in 10 years for the eastern Pacific. The eye of the storm is 450 miles south of Cabo San Lucas.

10-19 The Potato Fire north of Flagstaff reported today. So far 60 acres have burned fueled by strong winds. It was started by an unattended campfire.

Hurricane Rick was downgraded to a category 3 storm but still considered dangerous. Sustained winds of 125 mph and a watch has been posted for southern Baja, CA, and Mexico. 13 foot waves hitting Los Cabos killed one fisherman.

10-20 The Potato Fire near Flagstaff is 20% contained at one hundred acres.

A storm warning is issued for Baja as a diminished Rick approaches. The storm has weakened but havy rain, flooding, and High surf are likely.

Prayers offered as Typhoon Lupit nears the Philippines with 120 mph winds.

Kenya's drought has ended but 4 dry years and little crop growth leaves 4.4 million people hungry.

10-21 Rick now only a Tropical Storm but it may dump 10" of rian on Mexico's coast.

A prison inmate serving time for a burglary has been charged with arson and murder for a 2003 California wildfire. One thousand homes were destroyed and the fire was linked to six hear attack deaths.

From the Maricopa Communicator, "In Hidden Valley, a medical call for 2 females stung by bees over 100 times. One woman collapsed on the road. An ambulance responed and a helicopter was placed on standby."

An in Maricopa (the NEW Maricopa) "a caller reported a skunk in his yard. He called police to see if she should shoot the skunk. the idiot was advised to contact Game & Fish." and in yet another call, there was a report of an "animal problem." There was some kind of wildlife under his bar-b-q and it had a white ring around it's tail. (I hope it had black and white rings and was a rattlesnake)

10-22 A bacterial infection, Leptospirosis, has killed 148 and 2,000 are sickened around the flooded capitol of Manila, Philippines. The infection is caused by the water contaminate by urine and from animals and humans.

Rick makes landfall near Mazatlan with heavy surf and SIX INCES of rain.

10-23 Typhoon Lupit weakens and stalls of the Philippines. Lupit's erratic direction baffles forecasters. It may head for Taiwan or Japan.

Due to a prolonged drought, Ethiopia needs emergency food aid for 6, 000,000 people. 80% of the population lives off the land.

10-24 Lupit drifts away from the Philippines. It still has 75mph winds and heavy rain. It may hit southern Japan.

10-25 Storm hits Athens, Greece with one dead, one missing, and drowned animals.

10-26 Red Flag Warnings issued for most of AZ tomorrow. Flagstaff may receive snow and valley temperatures will drop 20 degrees.

Cat owners in the East Valley are warned of a cat killer that has stabbed 14 cats in the spine and killed 2. (sick bastard)

10-27 Due to high winds and dust, flights are delayed for one hour in Phoenix. Wind advisories are posted for most of the state. 53 mph winds in Winslow, 28 mph winds in Phoenix, and the snow level will drop to 3500'.

Las Vegas has used up its Colorado River water allocation. The southern Nevada and Water Authority (sounds impressive, huh?) has agreed to spend $900,000 on cloud seeding this year. (I have snake oil for sale if they have money left over)

The population of the endangered Mount Graham red squirrel has dropped. It is estimated that only 250 are left from a peak of 550 in 2000. It has been on the endangered species list since 1987. Forest fires and the ongoing drought with poor cone drop and weakened trees are to blame. (couldn't have anything to do with a big ass telescope that took their food source, could it?)

The City of Maricopa is working on a ten million dollar project to develop land in major flood plain. But this area was hit by devastating floods in 1983 and in 1993. Flooding along the wash reaches 10,000 cubic feet per second. (the fools have no idea! In 1983 I was literally cut off from working in Phoenix for a week. Maricopa made national news with people on roof tops and heavy damage to the school and homes. 1993 was not as bad because by then bridges were built on Maricopa road along the washes of the Gila River. Go ahead and build and we will call ourselves New Orleans of the desert.

10-28 Temperatures in the Valley are 25 degrees below yesterday. Thow inches of snow fell in Pinetop/Lakeside. The Valley tied the low-high temperature set in 1911.

First major winter storm hits Colorado and Wyoming. Denver may get a foot of snow and Cheyenne has blizzards and 18 " of snow.

Typhoon Mirinae may hit the Philippines after back-to-back storms have killed nine hundred and twwenty-nmine and affected 9 million.

Record drought and poor planning have made blackouts and water shortages more frequent in Venezuela. "El Nino and the wealthy to blame." HUH?

10-29 Fifteen degrees at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill. (ooshy!)

A slow moving storm in the Rocky Montains has dumped 3 feet of snow in parts of Colorado. Denver schools are closed and this is the most snow since 1997.

Two coyotes attacked and killed a popular musician as she was hiking alone in a national park in Eastern Canada. the victim as Taylor Mitchell, 19 years old and a songwriter from Toronto.

10-30 The officail snow total was reported from Ryduck in his secluded Colorado location was 27" with a wind chilll of 6 degrees.

3 tornados hit Louisiana and 2 in Arkansas.

Some areas in between Memphis and new Orleans will get SIX INCHES of rain in 24 hours.

10-31 Louisiana Governor declares a state of emergency after storms damage part of the state.

Typhoon Mirinae slams an already soggy Philippines causing 100,000 to seek shelter on higher ground.

David Bargber, the research chair in Arctic System Science says we are almost out of old Arctic Sea Ice. The multi-layer ice gets up to two hundree and 60 feet thick. In some areas it has been reduced to 20 inches and called "rotten ice." Mr. Barber said, "I've never seen anything like this in my 30 years of working in the high Arctic."

A dozen buffalo have been taken from a herd of 500 in South Dakota and trucked to Kansas. this is the first time in 140 years Kansas land has had the beasts.

A Florida Fish and Wildlife officer loses a five food alligator after bringing it to his daugher's school for show and tell. (oops!)

An Arizona woman survives 2 days of freezing temperatures at the bottom of a 300 foot embankment following a roll over accident that killed her husband. She was found by a snow plow driver on US 191 near Safford.

We will conclude these amazing weather facts with Twinky Duck's little known Arizona weather facts. Hawley Lake recoreded Arizona's coldest temperature on record of 40 below on January 7th, 1971. The coldest temperature on record in Phoenix was 16 degrees recorded on January 7th, 1913.

The quote of the month from Mighty Broadduck is "You can't hide your tears in the rain when you live in the desert."

Ryduck's weather by nature signs entry for this month is, "If you can't see the sharp points on a half moon, rain is on the way."

And finally the song of the month is "Feather in a Hurricane" by Michelle Malone.

Until next month remember, Pioneers took bullets. Settlers took land.

The Distinguished and Honorable Professor MR Blue Duck

Quack.

September Blue Duck Weather 2009

September 2009 Weather News

There are a two additions to this action packed ever evolving mind altering weather journal; the fledgling TwinkyDuck will be reporting on rare statistics and records in this beloved state of Arizona. A faithful reader of this ingenious weather report, RyDuck, will be reporting eventful weather as it happens from a secluded and secret location in the high mountains of Colorado. We are proud to announce both of these fine weather buffs to our Duckitzer Prize Winning weather reporting staff (not to be confused with the Pulitzer, actually this one is more prestigious.)

This fine edition of BlueDuck Weather has many astounding facts far beyond the weather in itself. You will actually read a corny duck joke that will be dubbed a literary cartoon. Read how the 2009 monsoon was a bust, the difference between Atlantic and Pacific hurricanes, more missing hikers in Arizona, rare flash flooding in Sedona for September, my personal decree of when the monsoon was over instead of the bullshit official date of September 30th, a popular Arizona lake which has turned into a garbage pit, man eating pythons right here in the United States, where Aspen trees are dying off at an alarming rate, more California wildfires, Environmental terrorism, Feral cats overrunning one city in the Phoenix area, bizarre human behavior around animals and last and I hope certainly least “cat attire to make them feel sexy.” ( What has happened to this fucked up world?) Oh and lest we forget, another sighting of the egg sucking Bull snake that some of you saw in an amazing photo shot earlier this month on The Land!

In my not so humble opinion September was boring on the desert, I was ready for the summer to be over, the monsoon didn’t do shit (although much more impressive rain amounts occurred at the Land than for you dried up Bastards in Phoenix) and I was just ready for the psychological mind fuck of summer to be over. September just droned on and there was only one degree of average cooling at the end of the month than the beginning of the month. Thankfully there were no 110s but Phoenix had five days of over one hundred and five, two of them nearly set records at the end of the month. The ever cool paradise known as The Land never reached 105. On the other hand the cool mountains of Talking Trees and Antelope Hill cooled ten degrees from the beginning of the month to the end. Yes Virginia, there is Fall somewhere.

The average temperature at the Land was 85.16 degrees and the high country of New Mexico was 60.40 degrees.

The average humidity at the Land was 31.70%. The average dew point was 47.06 degrees. This was nowhere in monsoon territory so how can the National Weather Service proclaim September 30th as the new end of the “official” monsoon?

The average wind speed was 5.23mph.
The Land had an impressive .48’’ of rain for the month bringing the total rainfall for the year to 4.01’’ for the year. The official total for Phoenix for the year is 2.78“.

Through exhaustive research TwinkyDuck found that the greatest amount of rainfall in Arizona for a twenty four hour period was 11.4’’ near Globe on September 4-5, 1970. This is unimaginable to me. One summer night on my birthday in the mid 80's almost four inches of rain fell. We were unable to drive anywhere for two days and the roads looked like a moonscape, contorted with beaches of sand in the middle of them and cars resting capriciously on that sand. Our mailbox and stand, set in concrete was washed away never to be found. Although our porch is sixteen inches above the ground scorpions were crawling between the boards to escape the water. Another example is RyDuck and I were trapped by floodwaters for an additional twenty four hours after an inch and a half of rain fell in twelve hours north of the area that received over eleven inches of rain on that fateful day.

Although they say the melting snow pack is what really effects water storage in the desert the lack of summer rains have to be a contributing factor also. Here are the pathetic lake levels for the end of summer; Mead is down to 40%, Powell is the shining river rising to 64%, Pleasant is holding her own at 91% and Roosevelt is down to 80% from 100% last Spring.
9-1- The Water Wheel fire north of Payson has grown to eight hundred acres and is 20% contained. Moisture from hurricane may reach Arizona in three days.

Sixty two buildings are destroyed and twelve thousand homes are threatened by fire north of L.A. There are thirty six thousand firefighters fighting fires around California. Many are praying that moisture from Hurricane Jimena will help the fight.

Mexico evacuates thousands ahead of Hurricane Jimenez. It has weakened to a Category 3 hurricane but still threatens Cabos San Lucas with 120mph winds.

9-2- Fire north of Payson forty five percent contained.
Fifty percent humidity helps firefighters in California. The largest fire is twenty two percent contained.

Tropical Storm Erika forms in the Atlantic.
Most Pacific hurricanes never make landfall but Jimena is. This hurricane is pounding the center of the Mexico Baja, California Peninsula but winds have diminished to 105mph. The last time a hurricane struck California was in 1858.
Oceanic and atmospheric conditions push Atlantic hurricanes toward land and Pacific hurricanes away from land.

These two animal stories were reported in the tiny Maricopa Communicator and I root for the animals. “An animal problem was reported at the high school football field. The maintenance crew said a skunk with a cup on its head was trapped under a trash can.” “An animal problem was reported at Bowlin Road and Highway 347 when a coyote was seen going toward Maricopa Elementary School. ( Call out the fucking heavy arsenal!)

9-3- The massive wildfire north of Los Angeles has burned over one hundred and forty thousand acres, destroyed sixty four homes and threatens twelve thousand more. The fire was human caused but the reason is not yet known. It has turned into a homicide investigation since two firefighters have been killed. The fire is only twenty eight percent contained.
Hurricane Jimena is downgraded to a tropical storm but drought stricken areas of Mexico are receiving drenching rain.

Temperatures in the Arctic Ocean are warmer than they have been in the last two thousand years according to some scientists.

9-4- Apache Junction and Queen Creek, Arizona received three inches of rain in one hour last night. Flash flood watches are issued for Globe and Wickenberg. With some help from the rain the Taylor and the Waterwheel fires in northern Arizona are contained.
The Station fire north of Los Angeles is now the largest fire in California history. It is forty five percent contained.

9-5- There is a Flash Flood Watch for the entire state of Arizona. The largest storm of the monsoon season has occurred thanks to moisture left over from Jimena. 1.38’’ of rain fell in Apache Junction and 1.14’’ in Queen Creek.
The west end of the Station Fire in California has been contained. The fire has burned one hundred and fifty four thousand acres with seventy six homes burned. A one hundred thousand dollar reward is offered for the capture of the arsonist(s).

Heavy flooding in west Africa affecting three hundred and fifty thousand people.
The drought is drying up springs in Austin, Texas and the Barton Springs salamander, unique to the area, is threatened.

For the first time in United States history two Great White sharks have been spotted, tracked and tagged for observation near Cape Cod.

9-5- The Station Fire is fifty percent contained.
The Arizona Game and Fish Department is seeking the publics help to determine who wounded a large bull elk near Tusayan last month. The elk was wounded by an arrow but archery season does not begin until mid September.

9-7- A dry winter and a weak monsoon places Arizona back on drought status. 2.77’’ of rain is normal for the monsoon, so far only .08’’ officially in Phoenix.

The Station Fire has been burning for fourteen days consuming one hundred fifty thousand, two hundred and twenty acres. It is fifty six percent contained.

Tropical Storm Linda is forming in the Pacific.

A hiker has been missing in the Grand Canyon for a week. The man checked into a hotel and hasn’t been seen since. His car was found at a trail head. Relatives say he was an experienced hiker.

A mountain lion living in a Seattle park for two weeks closes the park until its capture.

9-8- If you will recall last month I reported a link for reporting rain. As it turned out it was a link to gay website. Today in the Arizona Republic the correct link was issued as a “correction.’’

Tropical Storm Fred in the Atlantic has the potential to be a hurricane in two to five days.
Rain floods parts of Mexico City. Three and a half inches of rain fell in one day but it is not enough to ease the drought.

9-9- Missing hiker found dead in the Grand Canyon. No cause was released.

“Once in a century” rain kills twenty in Turkey with six foot deep flash flooding.

Fred turns into a Category 3 hurricane with 120mph sustained winds.
A fierce storm that turned into a tornado kills fifteen people in Argentina and Brazil.
Landslides in Chile kills two and strands foreign skiers. Heavy rain has been falling instead of snow.

9-10- Flash flooding damages the town of Sedona, Arizona with two and a half inches of rain in one hour. (Sure wish I would have been there snug as a bug in a cabin at Junipine.)
Fred weakens to a Category 2 hurricane.

The Farmer’s Almanac predicts a colder winter, contrary to the National Weather Service. Despite new technology millions, especially in rural areas trust the Almanac.

9-11- WE CAN NEVER FORGET!

Cleanup is under way in Sedona after flash floods and mud ran into businesses and stacked cars on top of one another. Water ran into some stores and one school.

Two men were rescued off of Camelback mountain in Phoenix. One was stung one hundred times by bees and the other was overcome by heat.

9-12- A Flash Flood Advisory is issued for Yavapai County in Arizona. Cottonwood receives heavy rain.

A hiker is missing in the Lost Dutchman State Park near the Superstition Mountains in Arizona.

Although it has been a mild hurricane season this is the first anniversary of Hurricane Ike. It was the third most destructive hurricane in U.S. history.

9-13- Horseback riders and dogs join in the search for the missing hiker in Lost Dutchman State Park. The man was an experienced hiker and only supposed to be gone for half of a day. His motorcycle was found in the parking lot.

Storms in Walnut Creek, California knock out power and start brush fires.

9-14- THE MONSOON IS OVER AT THE LAND! Dew points have been down into the forties for several days, the sky is blue and the air is drying out.

Torrential rain has ravaged Africa’s western coast for the past three months killing one hundred and fifty nine and displacing six hundred thousand. People “live like fish’ and some eat, sleep and work in the water.

9-15- Today marks the latest Phoenix has ever recorded a one hundred and ten degree day and that was in 2000.

9-16- It is Official; this summer is the third driest ever recorded in Arizona in the last one hundred and fifteen years.

The search for a missing hiker in the Lost Dutchman State Park has turned into a recovery mission. Extreme temperatures and the amount of food and water supplies for a half day hike eliminates his chances for survival.

Texans rains one hundred and thirty five million dollars to rebuild the Galveston sea wall damaged after last year’s Hurricane Ike.

9-17- Missing hikers body found near the Lost Dutchman trailhead.

Eight inches of rain fell in Cookesville, Tennessee.

Tropical Storm Marty forms in the Pacific. This is the 13th named storm this season. There has been more activity in the Pacific than the Atlantic.

Lightning kills five children in Africa as they were preparing to begin their school day.

9-18- A thirteen year old boy is charged with starting a twenty one hundred acre wildfire with matches in California. He may have set other fires according to investigators. (A prankster or an environmental terrorist?)

9-19- Two and a half inches of rain fell in forty eight minutes near Roosevelt Lake! Dust storms in Pinal County with 25mph sustained winds.

Volunteer scuba divers clean up trash at the bottom of “pristine” Lake Pleasant near Phoenix. They reported a dump with diapers, cans and even a bbq. Today marks an effort to clean up lakes worldwide.

The Station fire is still burning after twenty four days and one hundred and eighty nine thousand acres have been consumed.

A new species of fish has been found near Brazil.

9-20- Air crews continue to drop water on the Station fire. It is ninety three percent contained but a warming trend and Santa Ana winds are forecast.

A record five inches of rain fell in Atlanta, Georgia.

Five African rock pythons have been caught in the Florida Everglades. This species of snake has been known to eat people in Africa. It may be a hybrid introduced to this area. ( I guess I shouldn’t be so pissed about finding a bull snake swallowing a chicken egg today at The Land.)

9-21- Aspen trees in northern Arizona are dying off at an alarming rate. There are up to ninety percent fewer trees in some areas than fifteen years ago. Drought, insects and the grazing habits of elk may be to blame.

One day before Autumn and RyDuck reports the first snow of the season from his secluded location in Colorado.

Some parts of Georgia have received TWENTY INCHES OF RAIN in the last three days. Three die after being swept away in their cars by flood waters.

9-22- Autumn begins at two fifteen p.m. in Phoenix. A freeze warning is issued for northern Arizona for tonight above seven thousand feet. ( Yes sir, it’s a fucking celebration. The Land didn’t make it to one hundred degrees today. I’ve got my long johns out and ready to wear.)

A State of Emergency has been declared due to recent flooding in Sedona.
Snow in parts of Colorado and a Winter Storm Watch has been posted for Boulder.
Flooding has cut off freeways in Georgia. There are seventeen bridges under water or washed out. The death toll from drowning is up to eight.

The U.S. Department of Agriculture has designated fifty out of fifty eight counties in California natural disaster areas due to crop losses from a prolonged drought. (Between fires and this the “Golden State” is in serious trouble.)

9-23- First freeze of the year at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill with a low of thirty one degrees.

RyDuck reported at three p.m. it was thirty eight degrees and raining. (Ooshy!)

Death toll up to ten in Georgia as flood waters recede.
In Ventura, California a fire that began yesterday has grown to sixteen thousand acres. One college has been closed and one thousand homes have been threatened. Spontaneous combustion from a manure pile on a ranch is thought to be the cause.

Rare huge red dust storms hit Sidney, Australia and international flights are diverted from its airport. Five million tons of dust blow in from drought stricken regions. This has not happened in seventy years.

Only in California; a law is passed to allow only one rooster per property in L.A. County. ( I guess you might call it a noise ordinance!)

9-24- Tropical Storm Nora forms in the Pacific.
Numerous large dead squid washing up on Central Oregon’s coast. No reason for deaths given.

9-25- Six citrus grove workers in Yuma, Arizona are attacked by bees. One man went into shock after being stung twenty five times on the head and face.

The Station Fire, burning for almost a month is ninety eight percent contained. Rains will have to complete the job. The wildfire in Ventura, California has burned sixteen thousand, five hundred acres and is forty percent contained. A sixteen year old boy has been arrested in connection with a dozen wildfires. The fires had a “commonality” to them but no other details have been released.

9-26- A major weather fuck up was reported on National news today. The report talked about a massive dust storm in Phoenix with photos that looked like the Sahara Desert. There were not dust storms anywhere in Arizona today.

More rain falls in Georgia today and Vice President Joe ( the joker) Biden toured areas near Atlanta and pledged Federal aid.

A month’s worth of rain fell in Manila, Philippines. Tropical Storm Ketsana killed forty and stranded thousands on rooftops.

Foreclosed neighborhoods in Phoenix are overrun by stray cats and incessant breeding of them. No leash law applies to cats. ( I have a fine scoped air rifle that delivers a golden point bullet at about fifteen hundred feet per second. I am for hire.)(Mrs. Blue Duck says cats have NO worries.....Blue duck on the other hand better run if I see the air rifle pointed at a cat)

9-28- Wind Advisory posted for north west Arizona for tomorrow.
The Philippines death toll is up to one hundred and forty from recent flooding. Water had been so high in one area there was a mattress hanging form a telephone pole.

A mental evaluation has been ordered for a man who jumped into a grizzly bear enclosure at the San Francisco zoo. Authorities said the only thing the man did right was stand still as the grizzlies sniffed at his feet.

9-29- High temperatures for Phoenix may be in the high eighties in the next few days. There have not been highs this cool since May 22nd. Red Flag Warning issued for northern Arizona and a Pollution Advisory for Phoenix.

Leaking dam on the Green River near the Seattle area is the cause for grave concern. The dam has been showing stress since heavy rains occurred last January. The Army Corps of Engineers have brought in four hundred thousand sandbags to fortify the dam.

Typhoon Ketsana gains strength after leaving the Philippines and slams into Vietnam. Thirty two people are killed and one hundred and seventy thousand are evacuated. The destruction from the storm in Manila has caused two hundred and forty six deaths and 1.9 million homes have been flooded.

The fucking, egg-sucking, bull snake was back today. Enough is enough. The shit head just looked at me with the egg bulge in its throat. I can’t stand rude behavior in a snake. The next time I see the thief he is a dead snakes friend.

9-30- 53mph winds in Tuba City and 46 mph winds in Flagstaff, Arizona. The monsoon is “officially” over and ended up being the tenth driest and SECOND HOTTEST on record.
Fashion wigs for cats are being sold. A Lady Gaga wig sold for fifty dollars. “The wigs make cats feel more sexy”. (Are you fucking kidding me? )

Here it is folks, the quote of the month from the Mighty BroadDuck. “My head phones benefit me in two ways; to wrap the music around my soul and block out the idiots around me”. (“Arguing With Idiots” by Glenn Beck is in a book store near you.)

Nature’s weather sign from the elusive RyDuck this month is “A heavy red rainbow may mean more rain while rich blues suggest clear skies ahead.”

And the very appropriate song for this month is “Rainy Night In Georgia” re-done by Tony Joe White.

To close this fine weather journal the staff at BlueDuck weather has decided to include a duck joke. We never joke about anything in this weather journal because it all is a joke, and as my dad tells me almost daily, “I’m no Joker, boy, I’m the real deal.”

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon.
As she laid her pet on the table the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.
After a moment or two the vet shook his head sadly and said “I’m sorry, your duck Cuddles, has passed away.”
The distressed woman wailed “Are you sure?”
“Yes I am sure, the duck is dead”, replied the Vet.
“How can you be so sure, I mean you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma” the woman protested.
The Vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever.
As the duck’s owner looked in amazement, the dog stood up on its hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the Vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The Vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.
A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and delicately sniffed the duck from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.
The Vet looked at the woman and said “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, one hundred percent certifiably a dead duck.” The Vet turned to his computer, hit a few keys, and produced a bill which he handed the woman.
The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “ A hundred and fifty dollars just to tell me my duck is dead?” she cried.
The Vet shrugged. “I’m sorry. If you had taken my word the bill would have been twenty dollars. But with the lab report and cat scan it is now one hundred and fifty dollars.”
Contributing Editor, The Lovely Mrs. BlueDuck.
Until next month when you are staked on the ground and red ants are crawling and biting every opening in your body remember, Pioneers took bullets, Settlers took land.
The Distinguished, Honorable Professor MR BlueDuck
　
　
　
　
　
　
　

Blue Duck Weather August 2009

August 2009 Weather News! Special Second Anniversary Edition!

You may ask yourself “What the fuck can be special about this stupid weather journal when all the lunatic does is write about weather statistics after the fact, animal behavior and sometimes stupid people when it comes to weather?"
Well, let me tell you smart ass this is a special edition because I have now compiled twenty-four months of weather data to actually show the reader if our desert, approximately one thousand feet above sea level, and the mountains of New Mexico, approximately seven thousand, four hundred feet above sea level, have cooled or warmed since last August. Yes, indeed, our very own gnat’s ass insignificant two year study of global warming. There is no opinion, political correctness, social perversion or capital gain; there is simply average temperature data collected to show the facts. Pure scientific data.

But more on that later. I have an addition to add that I missed in July’s Weather News. The ever observant and scrutinizing TwinkyDuck reminded me of an article that she brought to my attention at my birthday dinner in July. I forgot to include it because I was drunk with the joy of turning into an old fart and having too many Duck Beak beers.

Being a true and professional journalist I have decided to add it to this exciting edition of BlueDuck Weather before I get to the usual nonsense that makes up this idiotic weather report. Posted on July 13th, 2009 the article read “An offshore earthquake that shook the Southern California coastline may have confused several giant squid sending them up on the beach. The squid weighed in at almost forty pounds.” Thank you TwinkyDuck for keeping me on my wobbly toes.

August was an extremely active weather month for much of the nation and the world. It was pretty boring here in the deserts of Arizona. So far the monsoon has been labeled the “non-soon” for lack of rain. There has been plenty of moisture present but not the triggers that set off the heavy thundershowers. At the rate we are going this will be the fifth driest monsoon summer on record.

I promised to depress you with the amount of one hundred degree plus days recorded and actually wanted to report the amount of days over 105, 110, and 115. But that is sheer torture. Let me say this before you shoot yourself, there were no days in August that did not reach below one hundred degrees. However, there were no 115’s. The normal last day of temperatures over one hundred and ten degrees is August 9th. Phoenix ended the last three days of the month by tying records of one hundred and thirteen degrees.

In this special anniversary edition you will drool on yourselves as you read about a bogus weather data link that turned perverse, tormenting scorpions, animals being micro-chipped, an American Forest Icon having a birthday, fatal bear attack in the United States, “Thunder wear” for dogs, (I swear, I don’t make this shit up!), sugary drinks banned from a Phoenix high school that has nothing to do with health, Green energy fucking with the science of weather and a brand new contribution from the “It’s weird I can’t explain it column” from my very own father, the infamous WaddleDuck himself!

And now as promised our very own microscopic look at global warming. The temperature at the Land was 5.85 degrees cooler in 2009 than 2008. This temperature data was collected from August 2007 until this month. The average temperature at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill was .89 degrees warmer in 2009 than the previous year.

The average temperature at The Land was 91.15 degrees this month. The averages at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill was 67.36 degrees. We were four degrees cooler at the end of the month than the beginning. Talking Trees and Antelope Hill was six degrees cooler.

The average humidity at The Land was 35.71%. The average dew point was 50.70 degrees.
The average wind speed at The Land was 7.17 mph, yet another windy month!
The Land received an impressive .96 inches of rain for the month and the yearly rainfall stands at 3.65 inches.

Fucking Lake Mead is still drying up and is at 40%. Powell is still rising at 63%. Roosevelt Lake is down to 85% and Pleasant 91%.

8-1- Excessive Heat Warning issued for Maricopa County and north west Pinal County until 8-2.
Louisiana’s oil ports hurricane barrier is washing away by four hurricanes in the last three years. The miles long sand bank is the only thing that keeps the Gulf from destroying pipelines and shipyards that handle 15% of all crude oil flowing to inland refineries.

So far this has been an unusually mild tornado season in “Tornado Alley.”
Next time you go to the beach for a relaxing frolic in the water (shit) consider this; water quality tested at six thousand U.S. beaches found high levels of bacteria. The water samples violated health standards with the presence of human and animal waste. Drink up!

8-2- Eighty nine degree record high low recorded in Phoenix this morning. Later in the afternoon a Dust Storm Warning was posted for Graham, Gila and Cochise Counties with 50 mph winds recorded.

Flooding from Maine to Pennsylvania with four inches of rain recorded. Summer heat has not hit the East this year. Record lows are recorded from Kansas to Wisconsin.
Fires fueled by winds on Spain’s Canary Islands are out of control Firefighters retreat with fifty homes destroyed and five thousand acres of land burned so far.
A shark attacks a fisherman in Louisiana.

8-3- In Redding, California dozens of residents remain evacuated after a weekend lightning storm caused multiple fires. Four separate fires have burned seventy six hundred acres.

8-4- A record high low of ninety degrees was recorded in Phoenix. Another Excessive Heat Warning issued until 8-6. Later in the afternoon a Severe Thunderstorm Warning was issued for Gila County.

Evacuations orders are lifted after California wildfires are almost contained but a new brush fire has erupted in Glendale, California.

8-5- Scorpions are on the increase in the east valley of the Phoenix Metro area. Some people are so frightened they won’t return home until exterminators have come. ( My father has been stung twice, once in the foot and once in the chest when the bastard fell from the ceiling while he was sleeping. Daddy is still ornery as hell and has no fear of scorpions. They are just part of desert life; unlike rattlesnakes in his house but that is a different story.)

Flashfloods swamp parts of Kentucky and Indiana. Heavy rain closed the University of Louisville. There was three and a half feet of water in the Louisville Public Library with thousands of books damaged. Flood waters closed portions of I-65 and the National Guard is deployed for rescues after six inches of rain fell in three hours.

Hurricane Felicia is getting stronger in the Pacific and is expected to absorb Tropical Storm Enrique. Felicia is expected to become a major hurricane by tomorrow.

Firefighters save Lillouett, Canada from a lightning caused wildfire. The fire forced the evacuation of five thousand.

The fire in the Canary Islands is now under control with fifty homes burned and seventy four hundred acres torched.

8-6- Under new Arizona law beginning September 30th all animals brought in to be sterilized will be micro-chipped. The goal is to cut down on abandoned and stray animals. ( When will this process begin with people and ducks? Go in for a vasectomy and have a chip hidden in your balls!)

Hurricane Felicia is weakening but still a category 4 storm with winds of 135 mph in the Pacific.
The Atlantic hurricane season will be less active than originally predicted. No named storms have developed but the peak period runs through August until October.

8-7- Due to lower humidity and high wind a Red Flag Warning has been issued for northern Arizona. There is a lightning caused wildfire north of Flagstaff.

Rain for Phoenix two inches below normal for the year; and Ozone Advisory issued today.
Felicia weakens to a category 2 hurricane.

8-8- The Wood chute fire has erupted in the Prescott National Forest. It has burned ninety acres and caused from lightning.

This morning had record lows in with thirty five degrees at Flagstaff and freezing at the Grand Canyon.

Felicia remains a Category 2 hurricane and weakening as it approaches Hawaii. Sustained winds are at 100 mph.

8-9- Highway 89A closed from Prescott to Jerome due to a brush fire.
Climate change seen as threat to global security. “The changing global climate will pose profound strategic challenges to the U.S. in coming decades, raising the prospect of military intervention to deal with the effects of violent storms, drought, mass migration and pandemics.” (Spooky Shit!)

The Morakot Typhoon hits China, forcing one million to flee. Taiwan has the worst flooding in fifty years.

Hurricane Felicia weakens to a Tropical Storm near Hawaii but several park beaches are closed due to high tide.

A mom and son were “vacationing’’ in Death Valley, California. They decided to go four wheeling and got stuck in sand. Although they had a case of water the son died of heat stroke.

8-10- There are six hundred people miss in Taiwan from mudslides caused by the typhoon. It dumped EIGHTY INCHES OF RAIN IN TWO DAYS!

In Japan Typhoon Etau slammed into the west coast with twelve people killed and ten missing from mudslides.

8-11- Three hundred people are rescued after a mudslide as the result of Typhoon Morakot covered an entire village but many still missing.

And here is a contribution from TwinkyDuck; The annual Peresied meteor show will be active all week from midnight to five a.m. It is reliable and observers have counted up to twenty five per hour.

8-12- This has been an extremely dry monsoon season for Arizona with less than two inches of rain so far.

One hundred and eleven square miles of the Los Padres National Forest in California have been closed due to wildfires. The fires are a threat to ranchers in Santa Barbara County. An evacuation order has been placed for fourteen ranches.

Helicopters drop food and aid to people in Taiwan trapped on hills. They are unable to come down due to flooding in the valleys.

A woman in south west Colorado is killed and eaten by a bear near her home. She had been repeatedly warned not to feed bears.

8-13- The Wood chute Fire in the Prescott National Forest has burned seven thousand acres but nearly contained.

A morning Small Stream Flood Advisory is issued for Maricopa County with one half inch of rain and 1.26 inches in Buckeye, Arizona.

Twenty four hundred people evacuated from the Santa Cruz Mountains in California from wildfires with no containment.

The effects of the typhoon in Taiwan are still disastrous. Hundreds of people fled their homes moments before a flood created lake burst its banks. Since last weekend fourteen hundred people have been rescued.

Tropical Storm Guillermo is the seventh named storm in the Pacific this season.

An eighteen year old hiker dies in the Grand Canyon after running out of water.

“Thunder wear” for dogs who get freaked out in storms is now available. Earmuffs, head halters and swaddling attire, including a snug leotard called a sheep suit. ( I have no idea what this means and it makes me fucking insane just typing it!)...we need to buy this for Rowdy.

8-14- Arizona fire officials worry that dry monsoon so far will raise fire potential this fall. One official described this summer’s weather as “bizarre.”

The typhoon that struck Taiwan six days ago has claimed five hundred lives and left seven thousand homeless. Agriculture and property damage exceeds 1.5 billion dollars.

8-15- There are now eleven different wildfires burning in California. Sixty eight hundred firefighters have been deployed around the state. A State of Emergency has been declared.
It is now official; parts of Texas are experiencing the worst drought on record since “modern day recording” began in 1895.

Massive floods and landslides have killed eleven people in China.
Hurricane Guillermo is still active in the Pacific but has weakened to a Category 2 storm with sustained winds at 110 mph.

Two Atlantic tropical storms have formed, Ana and Bill, in the far eastern Atlantic Ocean. They may pose a threat to the Virgin Islands and Puerto Rico and turn into hurricanes.

8-16- The Taylor Fire south of Flagstaff has burned seven hundred acres and the cause unknown.

Fires still burning out of control in northern California. The Santa Cruz fire is the largest with fifty percent containment.

There are now three tropical storms in the Atlantic. The third, Claudette, is nearing Florida. Three to five inches of rain and 50 mph winds expected.

Tropical Storm Bill is intensifying and could become a hurricane in a few days.

One thousand still stranded in Taiwan from typhoon. Storm aid assistance from around the world is on the way.

And now from the “It’s weird, I can’t explain it” file; my dad came over with a perplexed look on his face and told me he was lucky to be alive. I didn’t have to say why because he immediately began to tell me. Apparently he has a container full of sweets that he likes to raid and munch on before he goes to bed at night. After he ran out of his “gee-dunks” his wife filled the container with sugar coated peanuts.
He than proceeded to tell me after he had eaten a few handfuls of them he felt “things” crawling around his mouth. He than discovered the peanuts had “piss ants” all over them. Daddy told me he was sure he would “be a goner” before the morning came. Although the ants never stung his mouth I guess he figured they would poison him. He was quite impressed that he was still alive. I laughed my ass off at the story but am glad also that he is still alive and ornery as ever.

8-17- The Taylor Fire south of Flagstaff now at seven hundred acres. Embers from a lightning strike last week may have erupted into the blaze.
Rangers at the Grand Canyon are looking for a German man missing for the last three days. He was last seen stepping off of a shuttle bus at one of the lodges. ( Editor’s note: the Canyon seems to have an allure for people who just want to disappear.)
Huge Santa Cruz wildfire in California sixty five percent contained.
Claudette downgraded to a tropical depression but Bill may turn into a Category 3 hurricane by 8-20.

Ocean surface temperatures worldwide were the warmest on record in June according to “Federal scientists.”

An animal observation at the Land; Is it too early for small mammals to prepare for winter? I observed desert ground squirrels, or prairie dogs, heading in the same direction at different intervals in the afternoon. It appeared they were carrying yellow paper in their mouths. I discovered they were carrying straw to their dens. I keep a bale of straw next to the chicken coop (It is actually a prison since chickens are lower class than ducks. We eat their eggs so they cannot rule the bird world with their infantile brains and pass on degeneration.)

8-18- Firefighters are gaining control of the Taylor fire south of Flagstaff. It is ten percent contained with three thousand acres burned.

Hurricane Bill is three hundred miles wide with winds exceeding 100 mph and heading toward Bermuda.

U.S. relief workers are bringing aid to typhoon ravaged Taiwan. Hundreds of people are still stranded in the mountains.

A dozen dogs attack and kill a retired professor and his wife in rural Georgia.

Two girls in Mexico are struck and killed by lightning while attending an outdoor religious ceremony.

8-19- The Taylor Fire is sixty five percent contained with thirty five hundred acres burned. An excessive Heat Warning is issued for Maricopa County.

A tornado hits Beaumont, Texas collapsing a large department store roof.

Hurricane Bill is a Category 4 hurricane with 135 mph winds east of Puerto Rico.

An eighty one year old Phoenix woman was stung head to toe by bees. Police and firefighters have not found the hive(s) and will escort children walking home from school. The woman is in critical condition with four hundred stings and a broken hip from falling.

When paramedics arrived at the scene where the Georgia couple was killed by dogs they found sixteen “feral” dogs standing guard over the mutilated couple.

8-20- A man in west Phoenix is stung by bees when he used a shop vacuum to try and remove them from a hive. ( There should be a law like the “stupid motorist law” that applies to this.)

Tornados blew through the Mid West creating damage in Minnesota, Arkansas, Iowa, Illinois and Missouri.

Hurricane Bill weakens to a Category 3 hurricane but dangerous waves and riptides may reach the U.S. East Coast by this weekend.

Drought is taking its toll in Kenya, Africa. 1.3 million people need food and aid according to the United Nations. ( And we complain about the recession!)

8-21- The Taylor Fire is eighty five percent controlled.
Hurricane Bill will cause significant flooding along the Bermuda coast today and tomorrow. Recreational boaters and swimmers up and down the Eastern Seaboard are being warned to stay out of the water due to huge swales.

Mexico is suffering its driest year in seven decades. Mexico City is rationing water use.

The largest Catfish in Georgia history will not be eligible because it was caught by jug fishing. This method uses hooks attached to floating plastic bottles. The fish weighed one hundred and three pounds, five feet long and forty one inches wide.

8-22- Small Stream Flood Advisory issued for central Pinal County. Nine thousand people without power from storms in Phoenix last night. The football goal at Maricopa High School was blown over.

Hurricane Bill downgraded to a Category 1 hurricane as it spins toward Canada. Beaches are closed from Delaware to New England due to twenty foot waves.

A tornado strikes Ontario, Canada and kills an eleven year old boy at day camp.

Seventy five wildfires burn in Greece and hospitals are evacuated in Athens.

A man struck by lightning in Florida was saved by his baseball cap. The button on the top was burned off. The man is in the hospital but expected to survive.

There are concerns over the historic Kofa bighorn sheep population in western Arizona. The sheep, already small in numbers, are being killed off by mountain lions at an alarming rate.

8-23- In Edgartown, Mass.; a wave from Hurricane Bill swept five spectators away. Two were recovered and the Coast Guard is searching for the others. Bill may bring seven inches of rain when it reaches Canada.

Out of control wildfires threaten Athens, Greece. Ninety fires have broken out. Thirty thousand acres have burned with dozens of homes. Ninety five degree temperatures and gale force winds fueling fires.

An award is being offered to find the person who shot on of Montana’s largest grizzly bears. The bear was almost eight feet long and weighed eight hundred pounds.

8-24- Another bee attack in the Phoenix area makes three in less than a week.

Massachusetts woman stabs husband to death after arguing about feeding their dog before him.

Today in the Arizona Republic newspaper I saw a small article that read “Weather Service seeking people to measure rainfall.” Well I thought I would add that to my credentials and weather reporting expertise and tried to open the link that was in the article.
I couldn’t access the link with all of my infinite computer skills so the lovely Mrs. Blueduck offered to do it. She was laughing at me when she said the link takes you to a gay website. I was outraged! My fucking name is not Mr Pinkduck.

8-25- Excessive Heat Watch issued for the Phoenix area.
Fires in Greece finally under control.

8-26- Excessive Heat Warning issued for the Phoenix area.

3.93 inches of rain fell in areas of Nebraska today.

Tropical Storm Danny forms in the Atlantic.

No explanation for six young wolves found dead in Idaho. There were no outward signs of injuries or bullet wounds.

A two year old Florida girl was suffocated to death by family’s “pet” python. Her mother and boyfriend have been charged in the death.

8-27- One hundred and thirteen degrees in Phoenix, ten degrees above normal.
A new wildfire has broken out near Los Angeles.

Tropical Storm Danny is gathering strength. Residents of the Carolinas and New England are advised to monitor.

Wind farms are taking the blame for false tornado warnings. The massive spinning blades two hundred feet above ground can appear on Doppler radar like a violent storm. A false tornado alert was issued in Dodge City, Kansas. ( Why don’t you see if you can hurl Toto into those blades Dorothy?)( Mrs. Blue duck wants the men in the little jackets to pick up the head duck!)

8-28- Twenty five days so far this summer for temperatures at one hundred degrees or greater in Phoenix.

Fifteen hundred people north of Los Angeles are evacuated because of fires. Los Angeles and Monterey counties declare State of Emergency.

8-29- Excessive Heat Warning in Phoenix issued and extended until tomorrow.

Today marks the fourth anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. It was the most destructive storm on record and the fifth deadliest.
Six separate fires burning near Los Angeles. There are more evacuations and power outages. Dry, windy conditions not helping.
Jimena in the Pacific is a Category 2 hurricane. Mexico’s Baja California peninsula placed on standby.

8-30- Bees are swarming in from the hills behind Thunderbird High School in Phoenix looking for discarded sugary drinks to feast on. No more sodas are allowed on campus until cooler weather.

California wildfires out of control and burn thirty five thousand acres with six thousand evacuations.

Jimena strengthens to a Category 4 hurricane and may hit Baja, California by tomorrow.

8-31- A fire began north of Payson, Arizona yesterday burning seven hundred acres so far. The fire is ten percent contained. Five hundred people are evacuated.

The Station Fire north of Los Angeles has grown to one hundred thousand acres. Fifty homes are burned and two firefighters lost their lives when their vehicle rolled into a canyon.

Lightning caused fire threatens New Harmony, Utah. Two hundred and seventy five people are evacuated and twelve square miles burned.

A waterspout that turned into a tornado damages buildings with hurricane force in Galveston, Texas. One meteorologist said “it is extremely rare for a waterspout to make it to land.”
Hurricane Jimena has wind speeds of 155 mph and may affect weather in the south west United States later in the week.

The Mighty BroadDuck quote for the month; “If the world is a stage and we are all merely players I am ready for an intermission."

RyDuck with his infinite natural knowledge wrote “The ears of many animals are sensitive to low pressure. Wolves will howl before a storm and dogs will become nervous. (Coyotes are fucking insane and will howl if one of them farts or for any reason.)

And the quote I stole for you to ponder; “History is always made against the grain of Nature.” , written by Ortegay Gasset.

And finally, in tribute to the hell people went through after Hurricane Katrina four years ago, the song of the month is “The Flood” by Eileen Jewell. This song is specifically about Katrina and the (supposed) lack of response for emergency aid to the people.

Until you have to break off the arrow imbedded deeply in your thigh remember, Pioneers took bullets, Settlers took land.

Professor MR BlueDuck

.

Blue Duck Weather July 2009

July 2009 Weather News!

Like stoned flower children we skipped and danced our way through May and June drunk on an extended Spring. It was hot on some days and then it cooled down and then it got hot again and again cooled down.

And then came the hot iron breath of July and the gates of hell opened with a blast of fury and buzzards glided the skies like black devil ghosts devouring the rotten flesh of animals bloated in the sun like some out of control bake oven.

July in the Phoenix metropolitan area was the hottest on record. Excessive heat warnings were issued almost daily along with excessive ozone warnings. The Land even experienced two days where the average temperature was one hundred degrees; no relief morning or evening. When you see quail and doves on the ground in the shade of a creosote bush you know it is bad. A hike in the midmorning heat turned into death for one person from an Alaskan family visiting Arizona. Under inflated auto tires blew apart in shards of hard rubber from too much friction against one hundred and seventy degree asphalt and the mechanical beasts lay upside down after rolling with their wheels spinning in a pitiful claim for survival.

Fortunate for The Land there was three days in July that did not reach one hundred degrees and there were no one hundred and fifteen degree days. You poor bastards in Phoenix saw no temperatures below one hundred degrees. There were too many one hundred and five and one hundred and ten degrees to report because you would probably just shoot yourself in the heads.

This edition of Blueduck Weather will “stagger you out of your mind” with weather facts and

profound information you will never forget. Learn exactly what defines an excessive heat warning. Find out what state is enduring the longest drought. Meditate over the amount of day light lost each day after the summer solstice. See your official storm spotter in action as he braves the weather to call in an official spotting and save the world. Learn that there are no lack of bees in Phoenix. (This fine weather journal has been reporting for at least a year the mysterious decline of bees throughout the world.) And you will Learn where Arrowhead Water wants to build a plant to tap into some of the purest water in the world!

It was 7.5 degrees warmer at the end of July on The Land than the beginning. It was actually 1.5 degrees cooler at Talking Trees and Antelope Hill. The average temperature at the Land for July was 94.42 degrees! The average temperature in the high hills of New Mexico was 71.40 degrees.
The average humidity at The Land was 32.66% and the dew point was in monsoon territory all month at 57.50 degrees.

Again it was a windy month for the Arizona desert with an average wind speed of 7.14mph.
The Land received 1.36 inches of rain in July bringing the yearly total to only 2.68 inches. Mother Nature better get busy or we are going to end the year in drought territory. A large part of our yearly rain is normally produced during the monsoon season.

The major lakes in Arizona are holding their own with Pleasant at 91% and Roosev

elt at 92%. Lake Mead continues to turn into a mud hole and is down to 40%. It won’t be long there were will be water wars between the states that claim its water. Powell continues to rise and stands at 67%.

7-3- Dust storm advisory is issued for Maricopa County until seven p.m. Hail pounds Flagstaff.
Holiday traffic stopped on I-17 so DPS could rescue a rooster.( This must have been one fucking important bird!)

7-5- Flooding in southern China kills fifteen people and displaces five hundred and fifty thousand.
A plan to restore the salmon runs in California’s Sacramento River may help revive killer whale populations seven hundred miles to the north in Puget Sound. Without salmon from American rivers, killer whales may face extinction.

7-6- Officials call off search for missing man in the Superstition Mountains. The only thing found is his vehicle.
Avondale, Arizona residents are upset about all of the trash left near the Gila River by campers and transients. An effort has been underway to, once again, turn this into a riparian area as it once was.
China flooding death toll up two twenty people and seven hundred thousand more have fled homes.
Twenty two people die in Vietnam landslides and floods with thirteen missing in the mountains north of Hanoi.
We are losing a minute of daylight each day after the summer solstice in June. (This is worth pondering. You don’t notice a minute each day until finally you realize the sun isn’t coming up until after seven a.m. in November. Fortunately for sanity’s sake you don’t realize with each passing day you are closer to eternity.)

7-7- Severe Thunderstorm Warning is issued for Pima County.
Floods leave five hundred thousand people homeless in India.
Tropical storm Blanca has formed four hundred and ten miles south of the southern tip of Baja, Ca.

7-8- Flash Flood Warning issued for Pima County.
A nine hundred acre wildfire is burning near Williams, Arizona from a lightning strike. Due to wet conditions the National Forest Service will let it burn out on its own for natural clearing. This could take months (?)
The world famous Getty Art Center complex is evacuated in Los Angeles after an eighty acre brush fire develops.
Central Texas is enduring the driest twenty two months since 1885. The extreme drought is becoming dangerous and ranchers are actually hoping for a hurricane to bring them some moisture.
Blanca downgraded to a tropical depression.

7-9- El Nino is back according to government scientists. The periodic warming of water in the tropical Pacific Ocean can affect weather worldwide.

7-10- Excessive Heat Watch issued for Phoenix, Gila Bend and Casa Grande.
Tropical storm Carlos forms in the Pacific and may reach hurricane strength in the next two days.

7-11- An Excessive Heat Warning is issued for the Phoenix Metro area. A heat warning is issued when the temperatures are expected to reach one hundred and ten degrees or higher. It is defined as “extended outdoor activity will result in an eminent threat to health”. (What do they issue when the temperature reaches one hundred and twenty degrees, a Death Warning? So lather up with sun screen like a basting hog and hit the pavement in your running shoes and touring bikes dressed in black rubber gear sure to become seamless with your skin as it melts. Actually the fine men and women who toil in this heat should be commended for their sacrifices to earn a fucking dollar!)
Two Oklahoma men were killed and one missing when a tornado hits near Ontario, Canada. The men were in a cabin when it was torn from the ground and thrown into a lake with wind speeds of 149mph.
Carlos upgraded to a hurricane with 80mph sustained winds and is located one thousand miles southwest of Mexico’s Baja Peninsula.
Swarms of lady bugs in Colorado due to wet spring attracts tourists with cameras.

7-12- A touch of heaven (comparatively) occurred at The Land today. By one p.m. it was one hundred and ten degrees. It topped at 111 when thunder could be heard in the south. The clouds did not look threatening but by four thirty p.m. the dew point went from the mid forties to sixty two degrees. In one half hour almost a tenth of an inch of rain fell and it cooled twenty degrees! I almost cried with joy (or madness from a sun baked brain.)
One hundred and fifteen degrees in Phoenix with an Excessive Heat Warning posted until eight p.m. tomorrow. A (sick) Phoenix resident baked chocolate chip cookies in two hours on asphalt.
Lightning and thunderstorms scrub the NASA Space Shuttle launch.
Hurricane Carlos is weakening.

7-13- Another Excessive Heat Warning is issued for the deserts until eight pm tomorrow.
Thunderstorms delay another space shuttle launch.
Iraq drought and sandstorms worsen; once a fertile crop region is becoming a dust bowl.
A southern Arizona man is stung over a thousand times by bees while walking his dog. The man survived but the dog didn’t.

7-14- Carlos weakened but strengthened into a hurricane again but is moving away from Mexico.
Monsoon floods drown seven in a bus in India and rescuers are searching for an additional fifteen other passengers. The driver ignored warnings not to cross a bridge that was submerged by flood waters.

7-15- I-17 closed in both directions at Sun Set Point due to a brush fire.
Weather finally allows space shuttle launch.
Carlos grows to a category two hurricane with 100mph winds.
A fifty five mile storm barrier is proposed for the Texas Gulf Coast. The “Ike Dike” could cost up to four billion dollars and take twenty years to construct. It would become the biggest sea wall in the nation. (Your recovery dollars at work!)
Record high temperatures and lack of rainfall have sparked wildfires and destroyed crops across Texas.

7-16- A Severe Flash Flood Warning is issued from Payson to Globe. An Excessive Heat Warning is issued for Phoenix until 7-19.
The wildfire near Williams has grown to four hundred and fifty acres. Firefighters are not pursuing it aggressively, hoping monsoon rain will help dowse it.
A tornado destroys homes and barns in north east Wyoming. There were no injuries but five miles of one road was covered with fallen trees.
Tropical storm Delores forms in the Pacific as Carlos weakens to a tropical storm.

7-17- The first two weeks of July were the warmest on record for Phoenix. A Ozone Health Advisory is issued.
A Dust Storm Warning is issued for Pinal County and a Severe Thunderstorm Warning is issued for Pima County. At six thirty five p.m. yours truly, The Blue Beret Storm Spotter, sprang into action. Noticing a classic Haboob taking place I called the official National Weather Service hotline due to visibility being less than a quarter of a mile. I was surprised to get a live person on the line and she sounded a bit bored as I excitedly reported the amazing phenomena. After I asked her if she wanted my official identification number I could detect some amusement in her voice. She asked me what I guessed the wind speed was. I told her this brilliant weather reporter did not have to guess as my official weather station was recording sustained winds of twenty three miles per hour from the south, south east. With awe and admiration in her voice she thanked me for calling.
Due to the recession the nation’s coastal communities are preparing to help more people evacuate if a hurricane approaches; especially for folks who cannot escape on their own. More evacuation buses and storm shelters are being added. (More of your recovery dollars at work!)

7-18- A dust storm warning is issued for Maricopa and north west Pinal Counties.
A sudden change in mild weather kills ten climbers on Japanese mountains. Hypothermia is the cause after the peaks the climbers were on were hit by strong winds and heavy rains; very unusual for this time of year.

7-19- Extreme Heat Warning is extended for deserts until eight pm tomorrow.
An Alaska family is rescued off of South Mountain in Phoenix after a four hour hike. One boy suffered a heat stroke and is in very serious condition.
Fire near Williams, Arizona has grown to seventy four hundred acres but the rain is helping firefighters. There is also a two hundred acre fire near Globe, Arizona. The San Juan fire near Kitt Peak In Tucson is 55% contained.
Temperatures are down in the eastern United States while the west is baking.
The boy who suffered a heat stroke on South Mountain died.
Last night’s powerful thunderstorms and winds up to 100 mph have left two thousand without power in Gila Bend and Ajo, Arizona. More than forty power poles snapped and transformers are out. Residents may not have any power until tomorrow.
A lightning caused fire in the Inyo National Forest of California has burned two thousand acres. The evacuation of camp grounds and a small community were necessary.

7-22- HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR LITTLE TWINKIEDUCK!
7-23- None of the National Forests in Arizona have fire bans as Coconino and Prescott National Forests lift restrictions. Ozone Health Warning issued for Phoenix.
A man is missing in the Grand Canyon since last Saturday. He was supposed to return home on Monday.
Death toll rises in Japanese flooding.
Four construction workers die and fifty missing after a landslide slammed into a dam project in China.

7-24- Arrowhead Water wants to tap into Flagstaff springs because of their quality of water. Two million gallons of water per day can be drawn during heavy snow years, none when it is dry. Residents say no despite job possibilities.

7-25- Seven people have died in severe winds and flooding in Poland, two in the Czech Republic and one in Germany.
Eight large wildfires are being battled in Spain and six firefighters have died. Temperatures could reach one hundred and nine degrees.
Boston Airport is testing a new migratory radar to keep birds from causing planes to crash. Radar will track birds (except ducks) from four to six miles at three hundred and sixty degrees. Most bird strikes happen at five hundred feet above the ground.

7-26- A Dust Storm Warning is issued for the south east portion of Phoenix and north west Pinal County. 70 mph winds occur in Florence and Superior. A Flash Flood Warning has been issued for Pima county. An Excessive Heat Warning is issued for the Phoenix area until eight pm July, 28th.
The missing man in the Grand Canyon is found dead at the bottom of a one hundred foot cliff.
The drought in Texas is so bad that extreme water conservation is being mandated. Off duty police officers are patrolling streets looking for people “illegally” watering their lawns. The hardest hit area covers three hundred and fifty miles across south-central Texas. Texas has lost one half of its corn crop and seventy seven counties are in extreme drought conditions.
Tornadoes on the Florida Coast and New York causes much damage.

7-27- More heavy rains in China kill twenty two people from flooding.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE HEAD DUCK HIMSELF! love Mrs. Duck

7-28- An Excessive Heat Warning in Phoenix has been extended until tomorrow at seven pm. Eleven thousand, three hundred and sixty eight customers were disconnected from power use because of lack of payment. This is up three thousand from last year. A moratorium has been posted not to disconnect power when the temperatures are over one hundred and ten degrees.
Ninety two degrees this morning was a new record high low for Phoenix. Rain so far is an inch and a half below normal.
Seattle heat wave with temperatures in the nineties could set new records.
Continued drought and the possibility of lightning storms should make for an above normal summer wild fire season. Especially vulnerable are northern California, western Oregon and Washington State.
Flooding and landslides have killed twenty two in Nepal.

This month’s depressing quote from the Mighty Broadduck is loosely repeated because I accidentally deleted the first one when it was sent. “Life is full of addictions; it’s whether you let them dictate your life and how they will affect you. But if it means dying with a smile on your face, who cares?”

(I think the Mighty Broadduck is still morning the loss of the King of Pop.)
Here is the nature’s perspective of weather if you pay attention to it from RyDuck. “Geese and seagulls usually won’t fly just before a storm. Low pressure air is thin and prevents wing lift.
This isn’t exactly a quote but a thought to leave you with as told to me in a book by Sid Marty. The way the world population is devouring up our precious nature the only wilderness that will be left is the dark of night or when you close your eyes.

The song of the month is “A Hundred and Ten In The Shade” by Seldom Scene.
Until next month when the hurtled rock slams into the side of your head remember

Pioneers took bullets, Settlers took land.
Professor MR Blueduck